Jimmy fucked up. This wasn't exactly a new thing for him, especially in his rather inebriated state. Having someone like Jimmy drunk near a bunch of magical artefacts is a recipe for disaster no matter what way you slice it, and frankly everyone involved is damned lucky it didn't go worse than it did.
Fortunately for all involved, all that happened was that he happened to put his hand on the edge of a table, slipped, caused the table to topple over, sent an egg flying through the air such that it cracked a mirror and released a distinctly yellowish aura over the building that immediately affected everyone in the building. For his part, Jimmy fell asleep right where he landed and caused no further mishaps or mayhem. Thank goodness. It had been a lot of work to get a virgin with royal blood over to fix the last problem.
"Hey, what was that?" one goon asked another.
"Aurora borealis -" another sarcastically answered, and for his trouble started to immediately cough up feathers. "Wh-what do you think it means? It's a magical curse of some kind."
Indeed it was. Not a complicated curse, but a troublesome one nonetheless. Billy identified it immediately, of course - and so had our lovely Kitsune. Both were versed well enough in magic and curses to recognise something as piddly and obvious as a lie detecting curse that makes you spit feathers when you say something untrue. That is, something you know for a fact to be untrue.
Which creates a wrinkle when you're trying to swindle someone out of something. Hell, it's a problem when you're trying to conduct a legitimate business deal.
On the other hand there aren't many beings out there better at splitting hairs than a Kitsune. Maybe a Genie? For when they really want to dick you around on a wish. But you want someone to tell a misleading truth, that's when you pull in a politician, a lawyer, or a Kitsune.
"My most sincere apologies for the inconvenience," Billy said, in reference to the slightly yellow hue surrounding them. "I'll ensure the dolt responsible gets what's coming his way." Deep breath now. "As to your jewellry, I'll make sure you get a fair price on -"
He started coughing up feathers right there and then. Because, of course, he had no intention of giving them a fair price. Billy gave them a crooked grin and shook his head. Playing dumb, like he didn't kow what just happened, while watching their reactions to see if they had figured it out themselves.
Fortunately, one of them was actually unaware of what curse had hit them while the other was a better actress than any that's set foot on Broadway.
"I understand how these things can happen," Hu said completely honestly. She smiled sincerely at Billy. Or at least, seemingly sincerely. "While this is an inconvenience, I do not believe it will impede us from getting what we want - too much." Again, strictly true, because she was quite confident in her ability to get exactly what she came for without needing to tell a single solitary lie.
The first thing any scam artist has to do is convince their mark. There are countless ways they can do this, but it is a necessary part of the act. The word con is short for confidence, because the idea is that you gain the confidence of the victim in order to take advantage of it.
Which is why this author thinks that fraudsters are, in fact, the scum of the Earth and there is a special place in hell for them. Anyway, back to two experienced grifters trying to operate under a lie detection curse.
The fake jewellry conjured by Hu is the hook for her little ploy. But now they had to pretend it was real without actually lying about its true nature.
"So that jewellry you got there, it's really pretty looking," Billy said. "Anything special about it? We do deal with rare and unusual items around here."
Before our hapless protagonist - the detective - could answer that query, Hu leaned in to him. Many men would give up their right arm to have her whisper sweet nothings into their ear, but Benedict was getting it for nothing. Who was the grifter around here again?
"It's been enchanted in some way by a mischievous fox spirit from the orient," Benedict said after a while. Billy noted that he wasn't coughing feathers. Because, of course, that was completely true. Which meant that Benedict was extremely confident of what he was saying. He believed it to be true.
"Is that true?" Billy asked Hu. Best to get as much confirmation as possible."
"It is absolutely the truth, I am completely certain of it," Huh said. "What my, ah, partner has just said -" She let her hand rest on his knee. Oho, quite the sign of affection there. Lucky man! "- Is correct and true. A quite devious and sneaky fox spirit from my home country has enchanted this in some manner."
He was tempted to ask in what way it was enchanted, but that didn't really matter too much. The fact it was enchanted in the first place... he'd figure it out after he got his hands on them.
"Don't mind telling me where you got 'em?" he asked. "I ain't got a problem handling hot merchandise, so long as I know how hot it is. It'll affect the price, keep in mind."
All true, once again. Normally he would have phrased that quite differently but, well, no point in making life harder for everyone. Besides, coughing up feathers is... not a comfortable experience. At all.
"Oh, it's a recent acquisition," Hu said. "Formerly a possession of a rather unscrupulous man. The sort that I would not turn my back to in a dark alley."
"Or a lit one," Benedict pointedly added."So, how much will that be? I ain't letting this baby part for less than a grand."
Then he started to cough up feathers, which in itself was a trick that impressed Hu when she realised what he was doing. Benedict was deliberately giving the impression that he hadn't seen through that obvious curse, and was therefore tricking Billy into thinking their previous statements had not been carefully worded and misleading.
Or, more accurately, he hadn't actually noticed and was just playing his part, trying to push the scam on in his own way.
Billy, for his part, hemmed and he hawed in that way that hagglers do. Of course, he was canny enough to avoid using the phrase 'I can't go higher than' or anything like that, but he felt pretty confident that he was up against two people who hadn't noticed the lie detection curse placed upon them.
"$800," Billy said. Benedict let out a weary sigh and shook his hand.
For those unaware of inflation? $100 from this time frame would be worth about $1335 today. Magically enchanted jewelry was not a cheap business, and for good reason. You might wind up spitting feathers if you weren't careful with what you were handling.
Meaning that Benedict had just made bank on this job even before they'd finished.
<hr>
"So what was the point of that then?" Romeo asked after they were far enough away from the building that he didn't have to worry about being overheard anymore. "We didn't get into his vault."
"No, but we saw how he opened it when he put the, ah, jewelry away," Hu whispered back. "Now, we can sneak back in, open it up and take what's rightfully mine any time we want."
All of a sudden Romeo had a really bad feeling that he was making a dangerous enemy for life. Thing was, though... those kind of thoughts were a bit difficult to maintain when you have a pretty broad on your arm, and a mint burning a hole in your pocket.
No comments:
Post a Comment