The hallmark of an effective priestess is her ability to ignore the strange things and the temptations of this mortal plane so that you can focus on doing your job and <i>not</i> listening to the animalistic compulsions of your nether regions.
"Sensei, you're not coming down with a fever are you?"
Without warning Ataru number Four was standing right next to her, pressing the back of his hand against her forehead. Sakura felt herself start to heat up like a kettle on the boil. It wouldn't be too surprising to learn there was steam coming from her ears.
<i>Say that you're coming down with a sexual fever. Say it!</i>
That wasn't even her libido talking, that was her little used sense of humour piping up for a change. Her libido wasn't saying anything at all, it was doing a celebratory dance because it felt very, very certain that it was going to get its way in the near future.
"Nnnno, I'm feeling fine," Sakura said, gently pushing his hand away. It felt like she'd moved a mountain. Deep breath. Deep breath! Don't give him the slightest inclination that you might actually want a repeat of the night of the fake date. Especially the part where he'd hooked her leg and - "I'm fine! Let's focus on your training!"
"Well, if you say so Sens- Do you hear that music?"
As a matter of fact she did. Where was that coming from? It was a kind of jazzy beat. A jingle, like the sort you'd hear on television. She looked around, and then Sakura's spirits both fell and grew more frustrated as she saw the fresh nonsense that had intruded into her life.
"Welcome everyone, I'm your host Ataru #Six!" the other Ataru said. He'd found a smart looking tuxedo somewhere or other, and his tone had gained a sort of artificial pleasantness about it. "And you're here today, joining us on another round of 'Sakura's Lustful Desires'! That's right folks, the show where our super sexy priestess does her best to ignore the needs of her loins when it's clear to anyone with eyes what's running through her pretty head. It seems like she's survived round one: Checking for a fever. Now let's check in with my lovely assistant to see what she thinks of Sakura's chances of lasting the next round."
Sakura - and Ataru #4 - fumed silently at the pair of them for a moment. #6 in his smart suit. Ryuunosuke... also in a smart suit, though hers was actually showing off a decent amount of top cleavage. She was fidgeting a little, looking around seeming confused.
"Uh, hey! Where's this lovely assistant?" Ryuunosuke whispered.
"That would be you," #4 whispered.
"Huh? I'm the lovely assistant?" She sounded far too excited for that. "I've never been one of those before! What do I gotta do?"
"Mostly stand there, look pretty, and feed my punchlines. Maybe say something sarcastic and adorable every now and then."
"Oh yeah, real good use of my talents." Ryuunosuke rolled her eyes.
"That's the spirit! Now back to the game!"
"You guys, this is no time for a stupid game!" Ataru #4 yelled.
"Quite right!" Sakura said. She stepped up and tweaked both Ryuunosuke and #6's ears. "Why must you always speculate so much on my love life? Am I truly that fascinating to you?"
"Honestly," #4 harrumphed, angrily crossing his arms and turning his back on the whole game show bit. "It's getting to the point a boy can't get the training he deserves from his beautiful, brilliant, intelligent and strong teacher without someone turning it into a farce."
"Th-that's the spirit!" #6 said. This earned him a harsher ear tweak.
"I'm not playing your stupid game," Sakura warned. "Go bother someone else with your inane antics!"
"No, he means there's a spirit behind you!" Ryuunosuke said.
Instincts kicked in on realising what the girl had said. She pushed the two of them back and rolled aside moments before a big gaping green maw took a bite out of the air, right where she'd been standing. #4 tossed her some rosary beads, then moved himself in front of the other two. Keeping them safe while letting Sakura could focus on dealing with this wandering spirit. They made a pretty good team. Like a well oiled machine.
Well... oiled... Sakura's eyes glazed over there for a moment, but she quickly shook it off.
"Where is the fooooo~oood?" the spirit asked, rubbing its tummy and smacking its lips. "Isn't this an eaaaa~ating contest?"
"First, cut that nonsense out with the ~ in the middle of your words. It's really annoying," Ataru #4 said. "Second... Uh... Pardon me Sensei, what is second?"
"A gluttony spirit..." Sakura pondered. "This is not an eating contest. It's a pair of idiots mucking about."
"You won't tri~ick me that easily! I'll be sure to win this contest this time!" the spirit wailed. Sakura sighed and slapped an ofuda on it. "Ow! Ow! Ow!"
"Not a contest," Sakura repeated. She removed the ofuda. "Got it this time?"
"Oooh, blast!" the spirit sighed. "There I was thinking I had finally found her at last."
Spirits are a tricky business. It's easy to say something like exorcise them all, banish them to the otherworld. But quite often that's the last resort. It's only when they're harmful or malevolent that you should take such extremes. If the spirit is merely regretful, or particularly stupid, they might be quite eager to get onto the next realm on their own accord. Much less taxing, much less energy, much less time and risk for all involved.
"Say, you aren't going to eat that whole boy are you?" the spirit asked Ryuunosuke . "I mean, the way you're looking at him makes it quite clear you're going to be eating him later on..."
"I ain't a cannibal!" Ryuunosuke protested. Her fists sailed through the spirit as though it was not even there. A shame. She's usually quite handy in a scrap. But Sakura had a vague feeling that violence wasn't the solution here. The priestess clapped her hands, making a much louder sound than one might expect to hear. Then she asked a simple question that she hoped would bring this to a peaceful resolution.
"Who were you hoping to find?" she asked. "We might be able to help you."
"Ooooh... I am seeking a young girl," the spirit said. For a moment there the four living beings became aware they were in a porn fanfiction and felt extremely uncomfortable. "Not like that! You fools! She was a terror on the eating contest circuit. She'd clean her plate, and her neighbour's plate, and anyone that dropped out. They called her the 'pretty little black hole'. Oh, if only I could find her and challenge her again! That would be enough. That would surely be enough! To beat her in a contest!"
"Pretty..." #4 said.
"Little..." Ryuunosuke said.
"Black..." #6 said.
"Hole." Sakura finished. She stroked her chin deep in thought. Funny. That did sound familiar, but she couldn't quite place it. The three others were pointedly looking at her, obviously expecting her to think of the answer. As she was the most experienced in the world of spirits, such a thing was natural. "I'm drawing a blank."
"It was absurd!" the spirit wailed on. "Such a tiny, tiny thing that looked so poor and sickly! Yet she ate and she ate and she ate without end!"
The three got even closer, looking up at Sakura with big bright wide eyes. This must be so disappointing for them. For someone of her level to be unable to figure this puzzle out!
"Well, nobody comes to mind," Sakura finally admitted. The three of them threw up their hands in blatant disbelief. Oh, to let them down like this was so painful for her! "But as a priestess I am duty bound to help you move on to the next realm peacefully."
#4 took a deep breath. "You guys don't have to come along for this."
"Fuck you, I'm not missing this for the world," Ryuunosuke said. #6 moved in next to her, the two of them linked arms and she lay her head down on his shoulder. A gesture that Sakura adamantly refused to mimic with her own Ataru. Not that he was her Ataru. Except in the sense that he was her student. In that sense and that sense alone! Not boyfriend or lover or anything of the sort!
Five minutes later they arrived at an eating contest being held as an advertising event for an all you can eat buffet.
"Excuse me," Sakura said. "I was wondering if you could help us find -"
"Yipes! Contest's cancelled, folks! Come back next week!" the owner suddenly yelped. The poor man had turned white, then he suddenly started packing up. Had the spirit spooked him so much? Well, no matter. It didn't look like there were any little girls here, so they quickly moved on to another contest.
Where the same thing happened again. Sakura asked for help, the people running the contest took one look at the spirit, jumped out of their skin, then their skeletons started packing all the food away and ran off with their tails between their legs.
Then it happened again. And again. And again. And again...
"Huh, didn't realise there were so many eating contests in Tomobiki..." Ryuunosuke mused while her hand absently rubbed across her Ataru's chest.
"This area has a fine tradition of stuffing our faces," #4 sagely nodded. "If only this spirit wasn't frightening them off."
"I think it's Sakura that's doing it..." #6 whispered. "I'm sure they all know her by now."
"Ooooh, this is hopeless!" the spirit whined. "I'll never find that girl now! She must have moved away!"
This was bad. If the spirit truly believed that its dying wish was hopeless, it might turn into a malevolent spirit and start attacking people with intent. While Sakura would have no problem in putting down such a spirit if it came down to it, her pride as a priestess demanded that she at least try to resolve this without letting it get that far. But the situation was hopeless. Truly hopeless. How were they supposed to find some nameless little girl at this rate?
However. Sakura had forgotten something important about her situation. A certain fact that she was soon reminded of when the most delicious smell she'd ever felt hit her nostrils. It was the aroma of the Gods, and promised such wonderful things to her palate that it couldn't hope to deliver on - yet even the promises themselves were so sweet that she couldn't help but fall in love with... with...
"Step right on up folks, it's time for a brand new eating contest to hit Tomobiki!" Ataru #4, the version of Ataru Moroboshi who was somehow specifically twisting around to perfectly suit Sakura's need in a man, was standing behind a barbecue in a chef's hat and apron, rubbing his hands while some... unidentified meat was roasting away.
At that moment Sakura decided, fine. Okay. Fine. She'd have sex with him again. One more time. After this spirit was dealt with. But for now...
"What are you up to?" Sakura asked.
"Well I was thinking," #4 said. "If we can't find the girl... why not have someone 'pretend' to be her? They can challenge this guy to an eating contest, lose, and that's that. Perfect, right?"
It was. It was a pretty good plan. The spirit wouldn't be able to tell the difference anyway. So long as the 'girl' put up a decent enough performance...
"I only have one question," Sakura whispered. "Where are we going to find a dress that'll properly fit you?"
Alas... Sakura still hadn't quite got ahold of what the actual plan was. Still. Her Ataru would do anything to please her. Including dressing in drag to challenge a spirit to an eating contest. Meanwhile Ryuunosuke and her Ataru were sitting at the side, munching on popcorn and loving every little bit of this.
<hr>
Normally when a space-time corridor from Neptune opens up a person tends to notice. It's kind of hard to ignore a blast of cold and snow billowing up out of your wardrobe, quickly followed by your room becoming an indoor winter wonderland. It was also typically difficult to ignore the person that would usually step out of that space-time corridor: Oyuki may be cold and emotionless seeming at times, but make no mistake that this girl had a presence. An elegant, commanding presence that followed her as surely as the chill.
But today Lum barely even noticed. She put the chill down to the fact that she hadn't put her bikini back on and was sitting at her table in her spaceship. She'd been staring quite intensely as her Ataru was cleaning up.
Worth noting that he wasn't wearing any clothing either. Funny, isn't it? You always hear that you should be careful what you wish for in case you got it. In Lum's case, she was getting what she wanted with interest and it was <i>fantastic</i>.
"Lum?" a familiar voice called out. "Lum? Pardon me, Lum!"
"Huh?" Lum sleepily answered. She turned her head slightly. Oh. That was Oyuki. And another Ataru. Linked arm in arm. Oyuki wasn't in her robe today for some reason, instead opting to stand there in her silver bikini. When compared to her pale complexion it made her seem somehow more alluring. Pure and untouchable, yet all the more beautiful because of it. "Hi Oyuki. Hi other Darling."
"Please call me Seven," this Ataru said. "It'll be much simpler for all involved. Greetings One. I thought that Shinobu and Two were here as well?"
"They were," One said. "They left a little while ago after Two fucked her while I made her and Lum kiss." Huh? Had that happened? Lum couldn't quite remember. Or more precisely, she couldn't remember anything but feeling really, really good. "You know it's quite funny. She almost went out naked. If Two hadn't stopped her - well, that would cause quite some problems for her, you know?"
Something about everything that had just been said felt... Off. Lum couldn't quite place it because it all felt true, but at the same time she couldn't shake the weird feeling of wrongness about the whole situation.
"I should... put my bikini on..." Lum said. She lifted from her chair, but Oyuki gently pushed her back down into the chair.
"That's quite alright," Oyuki said. Then she took off her bikini, handed it to Seven, and sat down at the table. "This fits in quite well with what we were hoping to discuss."
The two Ataru joined them and Lum was feeling a little bit more together now. Probably the cold that was doing it. Though she had to wonder, whatever might Oyuki want to talk about right now? It sounded like she was wanting to discuss something serious. While naked.
That... felt weird too. Yet Lum still couldn't place why.
"Let me get right down to the point," Seven said. "We have decided that it might be to our mutual advantage if we all resided at the same location."
"To put it another way," Oyuki gently added. "We should all live together. All seven of us. The two of us, Shinobu, Benten, Ryuunosuke, Ran, Sakura. And our respective Atarus. Under the same roof. Together. As lovers."
Lum initially nodded along with that, but then her thinking caught up with her.
"Wait, why should we do that?" she asked. "That... almost sounds like a harem."
"Well, only in a technical sense," One said. He reached over to grab her shoulders, gently rubbing them while leaning affectionately into her. "But I can see the point in it, dearest. After all, the seven of us are quite unstable. We might disappear at any time."
"Quite so," Seven nodded. "If the seven of us were to suddenly vanish, or recombine into one singular Ataru Moroboshi, I expect you'll all be left heartbroken."
"And none of us wants that," One whispered. It was confounding. Lum's eyes flickered. How did he know, every time, what parts to touch to make her feel so good? "We want you girls to be happy. Content. Serene, peaceful." He kissed the nape of her neck. "Satisfied. Sexually free..."
"St-still... I'm not too sure about this," Lum insisted. Her heart was pounding in her chest. "It feels like too fast a move and - And... Ahhhhh..."
She trailed off as One cupped her breasts and blew on her neck. A faint smile formed on Lum's beautiful face and her eyes glazed over as her lover, her Darling, touched her in a way that only he could.
"Sorry about that," One said. "She's not quite as far gone as I thought. Kinda figured I'd be the first to finish one of the girls off, good work Seven."
"Well, strictly speaking I decided to go along with this of my own accord," Oyuki sighed. "One does not maintain a level of success without seeing where the wind is blowing. Now then. You are supposed to be Lum's ideal man? Then let us discuss this matter with you acting as her proxy. I suspect she's rather incapable of coherent thought right now."
"Buh..." Lum nodded. And so the negotiations began.
- One negotiates with Seven and Oyuki, with things taking an increasingly sexual turn
- Shinobu takes Two home to meet her parents.
- The eating contest begins
- Ran and the Moroboshis set up the wedding.
- Benten continues trying to resist
- Something else
- Own Personal Shampoo
No comments:
Post a Comment