Story: Own Personal Shampoo

There was something niggling at the back of Hikaru Gosunkugi's mind right now. Something about the situation he was in that seemed important, on the tip of his tongue, but he just could not quite reach it.

To summarise: He was in his bedroom giving a presentation to his fellow club members regarding the potential weakness of Ranma Saotome. To this effect, Alice had brought along a projector that she had... For some reason, with pictures taken by Hikaru himself and Kyoko earlier on being shown on the back wall.

"S-So!" he began, a truly stellar start. He adjusted his collar and used a pointing stick to point directly at the goofy face Ranma made just before jumping away from Akanen. "This is the face of the enemy. Notice how his brow is furrowed, and his eyes wider open than usual. Wh-What are these telltale markings of?"

"Anger!" Kyoko and Alice answered at once. Then, as one, turned towards each other and stuck out their tongues. His two fellow club members were sitting on his bed to watch his demonstration. But... Anger? Huh! Actually Hikaru had assumed he was afraid... But no, on second thought a big brute like that couldn't be frightened so easily. They'd already demonstrated that with their tests.

"Right, angry..." Hikaru mumbled. "Um... In addition to that," he clicked and the image changed to show Shampoo dunking a cute cat into a bath. "This inexplicable action took place shortly before the enemy arrived at the Tendo residence. It may be relevant given her actions earlier in the clubroom, but I can't figure out why she would - "

Kyoko stuck up her hand. "It's obvious isn't it?" Kyoko sniffed. "Haven't you ever heard? Sometimes Chinese restaurants like to serve up cat as if it's chicken. They'll grab stray moggies and kill them for their meat."

The other two stared at her in mute silence. Actually, Hikaru had never heard of that before.

"What kind of urban legend nonsense is that?" Alice asked, grabbing Kyoko in a headlock and giving her a noogie. While sitting on Hikaru's bed. Something about that was really eating at him, but why? "Huh? I bet you can't even prove that kind of thing! I bet it is like that one study you tried to show me which said that ninety percent of all Doctor's diagnoses are wrong. Who would even know you idiot?!"

"Well, why else would that Chinese bimbo try to drown a kitty?!" Kyoko retorted, reaching up and pulling on Alice's hair. "It is just lucky that Akane was there to stop her!"

"Shampoo is not a Chinese bimbo!" Alice yelled back. "Well... Maybe she is, but you don't have to sound so condescending about it! A body like that must yuri!"

"Silly perverted foreign girl! Yuri is not a verb! "

"Give me five minutes and I'll change your mind!"

Ah, that's what it was! Hikaru thumped a fist into his open hand in a true eureka moment: There were two girls sitting on his bed! In his room! All alone with him! Sure, he wouldn't normally want to touch either of them with a ten foot pole - someone else's ten foot pole at that - because of how crazy they were, but right now the two girls were practically in each other's laps and about to kiss if they scooched so much as an inch closer -

A pillow hit him in the face.

"In both of your dreams," Kyoko stuck out her tongue, then smoothed her hands out down the sides of her body. "This body is reserved for the pleasure of Akane Tendo only. So, why did Saotome leap away from Akane like that all of a sudden?"

"I dunno," Alice scowled. "I don't understand that boy at all."

"Maybe it had something to do with the cat?" Hikaru lamely suggested. Though to be honest he was still a bit stuck on the idea that two girls - two kind of cute girls actually - were sitting on his bed of their own volition. Was this really happening or just some weird dream? "Uh... Maybe he was so angry to see the cat in such a condition that he leaped back reflexively?"

A brief moment of silence here. If they had kept to Hikaru Gosunkugi's thinking, maybe they would have reached the correct answer: That Ranma was drowning in an ocean of ailurophobia with no hope of rescue. But instead...

"That makes sense!" Alice yelped. "Ranma Saotome... Is a cat lover!"


"Well... I suppose nobody's imperfect..." groused Kyoko. "But still, how do we use this? It's not much of a weakness, is it?"

"Dummy!" Alice sniffed. "Where there's a will, there's a way."


Indeed there is. Much the same way that where there's idiots, there's usually a farce coming down the pipeline.

<hr>
In the meantime, it was Akane Tendo's favourite time of the day: Bathing with Shampoo! Now, what we have in this scenario is a case of "ultimate envy", should anyone at school ever learn of it. Pretty much every boy and every girl would have felt themselves in a terrible dilemma upon learning of it. Should they be envious of Akane, envious of Shampoo, or envious of any insects that happened to flit by able to see this glorious visage within their short lives?

Of course only true perverts would want to indulge in the wonder and the glory of this private and intimate spectacle. So let's, shall we?

It begins with the girls disrobing. Akane would request Shampoo to disrobe first, and her willing slave would do so at once. There was no shaking of ass or grinding of hips, no erotic teasing performed by the Chinese girl. And for that Akane was rather grateful. She did not take kindly to teasing and so this was rather her favourite kind of stripshow. To the point and oooh yes please. No matter how many times she saw Shampoo naked it was never, ever enough.

Once that was done Shampoo would undress Akane. Starting with her socks and then moving up her body, removing item by item until Akane was methodically and quickly undressed. Standing there before her sexy slave as naked as she was.

Normally Akane would revel in every single moment of this. Not so much today though. Today, she was fuming mad and even Shampoo's alluring flesh, yielding curves, sensually appealing body and cute face was not enough to bring her down.

"Honestly!" she snapped while Shampoo lifted the uniform's dress over Akane's head. "That stupid old man! Ranma's father is a total idiot!"

"And we have proof now," Shampoo said. She had Akane's clothes all gathered up and walked over to the corner of the bathing area, putting them away to keep them dry. "Only total idiot use this technique. It say so in instructions, so must be true!"

"Yeah," Akane nodded, watching Shampoo's retreating figure with a deeply furrowed brow. Nope, even that wasn't cheering her up. "The only good thing about that man is his son. It's a miracle Ranma turned out so well."

Shampoo peered at Akane over her shoulder and smiled about... Something. Probably her intentions at making the two of them into a proper item. Whatever, right now Akane was so thoroughly pissed off at Genma that she was half tempted to march right up to Ranma and have her way with his girl form just to annoy that stupid panda!

Well, maybe not just to annoy that stupid panda... Ranma's girl form was about as hot as Shampoo... But never mind that, guh! She didn't want her first time to be when she was so angry at someone else! Maybe if she was angry at Ranma, she'd heard that hate-sex was <i>awesome</i>, but not when she was thinking of someone else.

As per the routine the two girls had established, Shampoo sat on the stool first. Akane then set about scrubbing down Shampoo's delightful body, taking special care around those splendid breasts. And occasionally rubbing her own against Shampoo's back by 'accident'.

"Felt good to beat up dumb panda..." Shampoo sighed. "Ah, Lady Akane, still too rough. Must learn to touch others more tenderly."

"Sorry..." Akane sniffed. She meant it, but it probably didn't sound like she did. "I'm just so... Angry! Poor Ranma, having to put up with a crippling fear of cats."

She finished up, and like always her hands complained that they didn't get as much the chance to feel that body as they might have liked. Ah, but now they were able to switch places! Now Shampoo was the one cleaning Akane's body, and the former warrior girl may have been physically stronger than Akane, but she also knew how to exercise tenderness, with a good understanding of shiatsu. This knowledge made this not so much a clean down but a massage.

"Yes, is too too much a shame..." Shampoo scowled. Her fingers found a point in Akane's back that made the girl momentarily forget what anger even was, no matter that she should be feeling it. "He strong warrior, but hindered by dumb weakness."

"What was even the point of the technique?" Akane half asked, half moaned. She arched her back, trying to make it touch Shampoo, but the slave seemed content to stay a little too far away for that to work.

"Shampoo not sure," she said. "Seems dumb. It make association in victim mind about cat be bad. Be afraid of kitty. Too too bad!"

Akane was too lost in Shampoo's cleaning to notice a twinkle forming in the slave's eye. "Form association..." Shampoo repeated, seemingly to herself. "If make association with kitty that not bad... Make good thoughts about kitty, maybe cure Master Ranma?"

"Mmph, that would be nice," Akane agreed. Shampoo squeezed her shoulders. "Ah! Ooh, did you have something in mind?"

"Maybe..." Shampoo mused, moving the washcloth down Akane's arm, then leaning in to rest her head on Akane's shoulder. "Shampoo have plan may work..."

Which was why, later on, when Ranma returned to his bedroom he found two girls he really, really wanted to have sex with crawling around on all fours wearing damp leotards, cat ears, cat tails and not a stitch else. But that's a story for another episode.

1. Ranma freaks out and starts going a little cat fisty.
2. Unbelievably, it works! By the time they're done Ranma has a catgirl fetish.
3. Shampoo's plan is a little more nuanced than this.
4. Meanwhile, the three club members plan their revenge!
5. What's Ryoga up to during all of this?
6. Something else