Story: Creeping Perversion

Do you know, it felt rather oddly pleasant assisting the kitchen destroyer for once. So often the two of them were on different sides that it honestly left Shampoo feeling quite lightheaded this one and only time they were working together on something. Though admittedly it didn't hurt that helping her out happened to involve going on a nice date with her beloved airen, and what was more having too, too much direct physical contact with him.

Ooh, just thinking about it made her feel all tingly all over! For all the time that she had thrown herself at her airen it was so, so rare when he would deliberately hold her so closely. Even now, peddling back home on her bike she could still feel his strong hands resting on the small of her back, smell his too, too manly scent, feel his body pressed up against hers.

It made Shampoo lick her lips. Ooh, it was so unfair! Like having a delicious sundae and being told you can only take a nibble. Shampoo craved more, so much more than that!

"Nihao!" Shampoo called on arriving back at the cafe. "Shampoo back from date with airen!"


No sooner had she made her third step in through the door than Mousse had grabbed hold of the houseplant next to the door. Shampoo ignored him and continued on her way as usual, while he proclaimed "Shampoo! I was so worried!" to the houseplant. "Ah, that fiend! What has he done to your beautiful hands! Your fingers are fused together and your skin is so... leafy! Ah, I cannot even feel your warmth!"

Without so much as looking at him, Shampoo reached into the blind duck's robes, pulled out a hammer and walloped him with it. "Feel this," she yelled. Ah, but not even that idiot could get her down now! Shampoo felt like she was walking on air.

Great grandmother hopped out of the back room on her cane as usual. She ignored Mousse and focused on Shampoo, but while we're stating obvious facts the sky is blue, water is wet and Shampoo's airen was a super handsome stud.

"How did it proceed?" Great grandmother asked. "Was the Tendo girl's intuition correct? Is there something <i>off</i> about your husband's behaviour?"

"He was little more grabby than normal," Shampoo admitted. With a great big smile on her face that her great grandmother certainly understood and approved of. "Maybe start to fall for Shampoo charm, turn away from ugly flat chested violent girl."

"Ah, my pure and innocent Shampoo!" Mousse gurgled from the floor with his finger raised in the air. The arm wobbled around like its centre of mass was entirely replaced by jelly. "Show me where that monster touched you! Your body must be purified -"


To which, Shampoo did a smart turn around and marched clear across the irritating duck's back bringing out a very interesting squeak. Otherwise neither her or great grandmother paid him any heed.

"Be wary of thinking only of short term gains," the old woman warned. "Too often, great tragedy arises because people think only of what they shall have in the here and now, without considering the future. While a more affectionate husband would seem to be of fun and great benefit, if there is something peculiar about his behaviour it may have longer term ramifications down the line."


"Oh," Shampoo tilted her head and rocked on her heels. Beneath her, Mousse whimpered a little. "Shampoo was planning on flirting with airen some more. Great grandmother think different approach needed?"

"Possibly," the old woman admitted. "A sudden change in personality and behaviour indicates a likely outside, potentially magical influence. For the time being it may seem useful, but until we know more it is safe to assume it will be detrimental in the longer term. Therefore, I must request that you hold back on flirtatious behaviour for the time being so that we may properly investigate."


Shampoo slumped in disappointment. She'd been rather looking forward to flaunting her body to her now interested airen. The reaction she would get to hugging him, rubbing her breasts up against his chest or back, the expression on his face if she moved her face in as if for a quick kiss. Where his hands might wander, where their instincts would lead them. She had been imagining various different takes on all of these on the way home. Joyful surprise? Lustful cockiness? Would he pounce her? Let her come to him? Or would it be more mutual? The thought made her squirm in anticipation, the not knowing almost as bad as the not having!

"Unfortunately to conduct our investigation properly we may needs Mousse's assistance," great grandmother announced. "You may fight Ranma Saotome tomorrow, Mousse. So that we may observe for any peculiarities. Shampoo, help him to his feet and make sure he doesn't try to run off before we are ready."

And off she hopped into the back room, presumably to look into potential causes for Ranma's strange behaviour, or at least means to detect it. Too, too amusing. Shampoo reluctantly got off of Mousse's back and hoisted him back onto his feet. The silly blind duck was very wobbly, and the front of his robe covered in dust.

"Stupid Mousse look like trash," Shampoo tutted. "Make bad impression if try to fight airen while dirty." Her eyes glazed over for a moment. Unseen by Mousse, of course. His eyes basically existed as decoration over function, the stupid useless things. Though now that Shampoo was looking, the idiot's eyes were rather... Aesthetically pleasing. Rather ironic really :The only thing those eyes were good for was looking into them.

"Ranma Saotome is already trash!" Mousse announced, earning him a kick in the shins. But not too hard a kick. He had to be able to fight tomorrow. "Ow! Shampoo, mind your step! There's something sharp and hard around here that just bumped my leg!"

"Idiot!" Shampoo yelled at him. She then got a rather peculiar urge, so peculiar that she acted on it without thinking. Shampoo reached for Mousse's collar and tugged down his robes so that they pinned his arms to his sides. "Silly antics why Shampoo think you is dummy duck!"

Mousse whirled around in the general direction of her voice. "But please Shampoo! There must be something you like about me!" he cried. "Why else would you tolerate my presence?"

"Shampoo not tolerate..." she began, then blinked very slowly as her eyes glazed over yet again. Since when did Mousse have a sixpack? Oof! You could grate cheese on them. No, better still you could grate steel on those abs. If Shampoo dropped a stick of butter on his torso it would melt in seconds. Probably. She really ought to consider trying that out later on.

Now, it's important to note here that Shampoo was not feeling the remotest trace of attraction towards Mousse as a person. No, not at all. Right now she was appraising him as a piece of meat and nothing more. Her ultimate appraisal? Dumb, but beefsteak. Her preferred meat of choice was still the wild stallion, but there's nothing wrong with eyeing up some duck once in a while. It's like looking at a cake when you're on a diet. Tempting, but you won't dare.

"Stupid Mousse ready for fight with airen tomorrow?" Shampoo sniffed and turned her head away. Her eyes soon tracked back to the well built idiot in front of her.

"Hehehehe!" Mousse cackled. He squirmed free from his robes and pulled them over his body. Shame. "Shampoo, the truth is that I've been working out on a more intensive training regimen than before! Right now I'm stronger than I have ever been! Tomorrow my hidden weapons will destroy him, and then you'll see how right I am for you!"

He slunk off upstairs, with Shampoo's eyes affixed firmly to his butt. Damn shame he wore such loose fitting clothes so he could hide his weapons. Eye candy like that should learn to flaunt it where they could! Hidden weapons? Yeah, there were guns up those sleeves and they were making Shampoo hot just thinking about them!

"Shampoo look forward to fight tomorrow," she mused dreamily. She could see them both in her mind's eye. Ranma Saotome. Stupid Mousse. Both of them squaring off and ready to fight. Mousse would yell out something asinine, then throw out his standard claw on chain. It would tear right through Ranma's shirt.

"Oh no, my favourite shirt," Ranma would say. He would then whip it off over his head and toss it right at Shampoo, who would hold it up to her face and breath, oh so deeply of it. Then he'd stand there, shirtless and in a defensive posture ready for Mousse's next attack. "Now you've well and truly earned this spanking."

Another claw and chain would whip out, but this time Ranma would kick it back causing it to tear through Mousse's robe instead! "What's good for the duck..." Ranma would taunt, then blow a kiss at Shampoo. Mousse's robe would fall from his back, and the two boys would move on to the next stage of their fight.

Instead of using weapons the two of them would grapple, collar and elbow style with both jockeying for position. Suddenly even as Shampoo watched the ground below their feet would turn into mud leaving the two hunky martial artists vying for her attention and affection completely caked and covered and -

"Mmmmm..." Shampoo shuddered. "Shampoo no can wait. Sound like too too much fun to be had tomorrow." Indeed there would be. Especially since she had yet to even start on her road towards perversion.

1. Meanwhile, Ranma is continuing to seduce Akane in his own inimitable manner.
2. Happosai steps in to help Ranma out.
3. The next day, Mousse moves in to attack Ranma.
4. Shampoo's odd behaviour is noticed.
5. Something else