Sunday, 14 May 2017

Story: HHL Sailor Moon


It's pretty admirable how this interdimensional Empire of perverts was set up. You really would expect that kind of group to make everything transparently perverted, set things up to make people horny and sexy. Yet there was none of that - on the surface level. They visited a reality, changed its rules and took over, then let societal drift take root from there. They had done this to countless universes, many of them quite strange and bizarre when compared to our own. Those worlds that were "conquered" gained many benefits in terms of technology and cultural exchange, even as their populations began to skew randier over time.

That was where Minako and her family had been, you see: Visiting other worlds, much the same way a Japanese family might visit Europe or America for a holiday. Except even more alien, even more exotic, and during that visit she had awakened to her destiny as Sailor V and joined a group of superheroes known as the Hound... Though her allegiance with them would ultimately be cut short by her early realisation of her true destiny as Sailor Venus.

But never mind that for the time being: Let us return to Usagi Tsukino, who was strolling inside the jewellry store that belonged to her friend's mother. They were the first in the store after that diplomat from another world had departed - of all things, a sheepdog! - and while he had been there the store had been guarded by some very large, very intimidating gorillas. As in, literally gorillas. Usagi could only shake her head in true amusement at what wonders lay out there in the multiverse. Ah, but if only -

"If only I could see them," Naru completed her thought. She playfully nudged Usagi on the shoulder and winked at her. "Really now, sometimes you're just too open for your own good."

"I have to agree," said a woman who essentially looked like an older version of Naru. Red flowing hair, same kind of pretty/cute face, but softened somewhat by maturity and wisdom. "Not just because she's my daughter, mind. Your facial expressions make you a pretty easy read at the best of times."

Ooh, those two! Usagi puffed up her cheeks while mother and daughter giggled at her expense. "So what, like it's some big problem that I want to go see other worlds?" she harrumphed. "It's not my fault my parents are too cheap to go on a multiversal holiday!"

"Usagi, I've seen your parents... ahem... Toy collection," Naru said. "They're not cheap. Not even a little bit. They're <i>nasty</i> and kind of freaky but they're definitely not cheap."

"Repressing memory in three... two... one..." Usagi counted off on her fingers, then shook her head and latched onto a new topic of conversation. "Anyway, I want to be a hero! Just like that Sailor V girl. She's blonde. She's pretty. She looks about my age. She's teeming with... You know, power."

"It's okay," Mrs Osaka said, waving her hand dismissively . "I already know all about perverted power. There's no need to talk in code phrases around me, I'm quite well... Ahem, familiar with it."

"Repressing memory in three... two... one..." Naru counted off on her fingers. "So anyway! How do you know she was teeming with power?"

Usagi frowned. This would take all of her concentration to articulate. Naru had been a victim of her own perverted power many a time, but she didn't really have any of it herself. A lot of people didn't, in fact most girls Usagi had ever met simply did not have that ability to hand. It's what made her feel kind of special, this unique <i>thing</i> about her that was distinct, different, unique and overwhelmed everyone else she'd ever met in terms of raw ability. What was the best way to describe it, that somehow at first glance she had felt a kinship, a connection, a certainty that the girl she was looking at in those news reports was just like her but had actually made it, managed her dream, become a hero?

"I 'unno," she shrugged. "I could just kind of tell at a glance."

"Speaking of telling at a glance," Mrs Osaka stepped in just then and patted Usagi on the shoulder. "I take it you came because you need a little extra pocket money? Whatever do you spend it on?"

"Sweets mostly," Naru answered. "It's been bugging me for years where she packs it all away, and believe me, I've studied her body quite carefully of late. All over, in great detail."

"Repressing memory in three, two, one..." Mrs Osaka counted off on her fingers. "Oh dear, it doesn't seem to have worked. Well, never mind. You're here for some modelling work?"

And here we can see one of the first real benefits Usagi had discovered to her perverted power. It was easy money. Sit there wearing some jewellry Mrs Osaka especially wanted to shift, radiate perverted power, and customers couldn't buy enough of the stuff. No need to even change clothes. Come as you are. Because of how intense her level of perversion was, all she had to do was sit there in a school uniform and she'd look positively radiant. Though she had to be careful. One time she'd picked her nose during a modelling stint, and she was pretty sure she'd accidentally given some customers a new fetish.

The door opened. While Mrs Osaka went to deal with them personally, Usagi walked across to the jewellry case and Naru went behind the counter. Sure, it did kind of seem a bit humdrum and boring. Mundane even! But to Usagi's mind -

"It's just good practise," Naru said, discretely goosing Usagi as she walked by. "Gosh, you may be powerful but you'd make a terrible superhero. Not a chance you'd be able to hide your secret -"

"This is a holdup!" one of the customers suddenly yelled. Ah, wrong noun: Try robbers instead. Usagi took a better look at the two of them and gawped. There was a stunningly beautiful buxom woman, holding Mrs Osaka's arm behind her back, and a big, beefy muscular man that looked like he could bench press a car. He was the one that spoke. He flexed at the girls, causing a bead of sweat to trickle down Naru's pretty forehead, and for her to stumble back.

The robber narrowed his eyes at Usagi: She'd not even moved. Oh, right. This guy was using perverted power to - Ooh! Now Usagi was really getting angry! It was quite one thing to hold a woman she liked hostage but to abuse perverted power in this way was... Actually not half as bad as the first thing come to think of it, but it still ticked Usagi off! Just, not as much as the woman over there twisting Mrs Osaka's arm was, gosh she was so angry right now!

"I said this is a holdup!" the man repeated, flexing yet again. This time Naru fainted with a trickle of blood coming from her nose. From Usagi, all he got was a scowl of irritation. "Ah, how unfortunate, I do so hate to have to hurt such a pretty young thing... Clearly no sex drive to speak of, how unfortunate."

"Idiot, stop being sentimental!" the woman insisted. "You, girl! Step out where I can see you while my buddy here opens your cash register. No funny business, or the lady here gets it."

"Do as she says Usagi," Mrs Osaka insisted, the cool mature woman replaced by a panicky hostage. "No heroics, my insurance will cover the losses but there's no replacing you. Or my arm for that matter!"

"No heroics?" Usagi repeated. She puffed out her chest. "They say that all it takes for evil to win is for good people to do nothing!"


"And who are they?" the woman asked, mockingly. "Honestly, unattributed quotes taken out of context make me feel really arm-breaky. Who the hell are you supposed to be anyway?"

"I am!" Usagi declared, quickly striking a pose quite similar to one she'd seen Sailor V strike in the news: V sign over her eyes, one foot lifted up to rest on her knee "Usagi! Tsukino! Warrior of justice and - Woah!"


She toppled over. Oof! That pose was much harder to keep up than she'd thought! By the time Usagi had shaken her head to get the cobwebs out, there was a bronzed god radiating perverted energy towering right over her.

"Ah, come on..." he sighed. "Look at her. She's just some wannabe daydreaming superhero. Probably seen too many Hound news reports, thinks she's something special. Listen squirt. My partner over there is a real bloodlust sort: The only reason she keeps me around is because I can knock chicks like your friend for a total loop, and I can satisfy her in bed like nobody else can. Right now she wants me to bend you over my knee and spank your wonderful... panty clad..."

"Hey, what's happening over there?" the woman yelled. Usagi watched the man carefully. Finally! She was starting to wonder when he would start reacting to her automatically rebounding his own perverted power back at him. Well, maybe it helped a little bit that due to the way she had fallen over, her skirt had flipped over her waist, showing off her legs and underwear. She reached down and traced a finger from knee to thigh, then ran it around in a circle. The robber gulped. The lump in his trousers was obvious and prominent.

Then Usagi winked at him, and the front of his trousers became quickly damp. His knees became weak and he toppled over, shuddering violently all the while.

"Hey, what the hell - " the woman robber started, then caught herself, pushing Mrs Osaka forward again. "Alright little miss, that's it! I'm going to break her arm, then walk over there... And..."

She trailed off at the sight before her: Namely, Usagi sitting in Naru's lap, with the two of them french kissing. Naru's hands were pretty busy running a continuous trail up and down Usagi's back, while Usagi was content enough to simply let her hands rest on Naru's shoulders.

"I did not need to see this..." Mrs Osaka sighed. "Ugh, Usagi why did you have to radiate so much perverted power while doing that with my daughter? I'd rather not be turned on by this, especially not this much!"

"P-perverted power," the woman robber asked, sounding much more meek all of a sudden. "Who are you? Girl, who the hell are you?"

Usagi pulled away from Naru's lips, resulting in a simultaneous satisfying plop, and a satisfied sigh. She turned her furious visage upon the robber. "Language," she admonished, then rose slowly to her feet. "My name is Usagi Tsukino. I am a future hero to the downtrodden and the weak! Though my only power is sex appeal, it shall be enough to put down evil doers any day, any time!"


She'd been dreaming of this moment for years. The moment she could finally use her very own patented superpower finishing move to put an end to the bad guy! It was finally here! After all those hours of practise in her mirror at home, not even telling or showing it to Naru, she could finally use it against a real life bad person! Usagi bent her left knee so that her foot was perpendicular to the ground, the lifted her hands up to her forehead, creating an impression not entirely unlike rabbit ears with them. She tucked her head down, and made her elbows press against either side of her breasts and then declared in a loud and proud voice:

"Super Sexy Bunny Hop!"

The faces of everyone else in the store became ashen and neutral in that very instant, yet it did not last long. For you see, Usagi put all of her effort, all of her concentration into doing a single silly little rabbit hop forward - and in the process flooded the store with perverted power. Not because the act itself was remotely sexual in any way, despite what Usagi might have imagined. It was simply because she was concentrating so much on it, believed in it so much, that the eroticness reached heights far beyond what is normally humanly possible.

Which is how she wound up being the only one left conscious after the other four people in the store had climaxed themselves unconscious.

"Uh... Guess I have to work on that collateral damage thing?" Usagi scratched her head.

<hr>
Elsewhere, a black cat with a bandaid over its forehead lifted its head upon feeling a massive release of energy. It couldn't be... Could it? Luna could hardly restrain herself. She had to see. She had to know. There was too much at stake for her to hold back for an instant!

<hr>
A handsome young man walking down the street turned bug-eyed and nervous. He felt something just now. Something powerful and wonderful, just a few blocks away. He wanted to run to it. Something inside him yearned to be there... Was this to do with his strange dreams of late? Mamoru Chiba had no idea, but whatever he was feeling it brought a peculiar smile to his face that he had absolutely no control over. Maybe it would be best if he kept his distance for now until he understood what he was feeling a little better.

<hr>
"Did you see that?"

"What, the mini-sex nuke going off in Juban? No, it completely escaped my notice, what with the alarms and the bright light."

"No need to be sarcastic about it... I'm sending in a stealth team to take a quick look."

"Send in Doctor Mizuno's team. She's our local expert in Erotic Energy. But I'd put money on this being tied into our little destiny bomb."

"So, exercise extreme caution?"

"Anyone that didn't after seeing <i>that</i> discharge would be a total idiot." A beat. "Also, have someone replace the light in this command room, I can't stand working in total darkness!"

"Ah the perils of running a secretly perverted multidimensional Empire..."


  1. Suddenly Usagi becomes a media sensation for stopping a robbery all by herself.
  2. On her way home, Usagi encounters Luna.
  3. Doctor Mizuno begins her investigation, knowing that her shy daughter has a tremendous untapped well of Erotic Energy which could prove unhealthy for her.
  4. Beryl alters her plans to conquer ECCHI instead of the universe.
  5. Back with Minako's interview.
  6. Something else


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