In the end, could anyone possibly be surprised that Sayuri would be the one to take on this responsibility? Kukuku! Her keen eye and superb taste was exactly what the doctor ordered.
"Senpai! Kashiko!" Sayuri called out, twirling around into her arms.
"Sayuri!" Kashiko dipped her and the two posed in suitably over dramatic fashion.
"Together we shall clothe that team!" they cried in unison, as though about to leap headfirst into a demon lord's throne room.
"Um... We have a free seat available?" said the waitress at this cafe the two of them had chosen to visit for this little conversation. "Right this way? And, please try to be less chuni, you'll scare the other customers."
"So, do you have something in mind already?" Kashiko asked, waggling her eyebrows.
"Ohohoho, I do have a few things in mind!" Sayuri sang. She patted at a sketchbook she had with her. "We'll have that team kitted out in the absolute finest baseball uniforms that you can stitch together."
"In other words, the finest baseball uniforms any human can stitch together," Kashiko sniffed, putting on a faux haughty accent. "I can hardly wait to see my little broth, err sister, wearing your designs!"
"I say thee nay!"
It was a cry that heralded nothing good for those who lived in Furinkan. It was the announcement of the arrival of the Blue Thunder himself, Tatewaki Kuno, arriving determined to ruin everyone's fun. He approached their table quickly, like - Well, like a bolt of blue lightning, determined and serious in his demeanour. He descended upon their seats with sound and fury, while the two young women tried really hard to ignore him.
This is not an easy task. Some might call it impossible. Yet try to ignore him, they... attempted.
"I shall not have these deviant women sully a sporting event, no less one in which my own twisted sister is likely to be in attendance!"
"Twisted sister...?" Sayuri nervously repeated. You see, completely botched that 'ignore' roll. "No, never mind that! This isn't any of your business."
"Your intention to transform my fellow male students into eye candy is most certainly my business," Kuno warned. "Now, let us see what you have in mind."
"Well... I was thinking some blue caps to fit the uniform, with an F on the front," Sayuri began while flipping through her notebook. Kashiko nodded with great enthusiasm. "White shirts with a blue emblem on the front -"
"Nay, I say! Nay!" Kuno yelled, grabbing the page, scrunching it up and then eating it. "White uniforms? On a hot day? While working up a sweat? You would plainly intend to make them see through! Make the uniforms blue as well, to match our school spirit! It is why the nickname bestowed upon me was selected, for blue is our colour!"
Kashiko then briefly leaned through the fourth wall. "I was going to promise not to make a reference to that annoying song from the 90s, because it would be anachronistic, but let's get real half of you already have the chorus playing in your head. For that, we humbly apologize and offer up a refund."
"They're reading this for free, we're not charging them."
"Refund acknowledged," Kashiko said, then pulled the fourth wall back together so they could resume.
"Seriously though, why do you even care about this so much? Don't you have something better to do?" Sayuri asked.
"There is nothing better than protecting the sanctity of a sporting event," Kuno nodded firmly. "Boys do not play sports to be ogled at by depraved and perverse girls such as yourself Sato! They play sports to demonstrate physical superiority and achieve victory!"
Both Sayuri and Kashiko looked to one another with raised eyebrows. Boys... did stuff for their own enjoyment rather than to try to impress or leer at girls? They had always suspected, but such things were practically heresy among girls! Yes, even after Sayuri had been cursed she still thought <i>regular</i> boys were like that. This might actually be because she was every bit as horny as the stereotype about boys of her age range - but that is neither here nor there!
"I think some shorts would be suitable for - "
"How snug?" Kuno asked pointedly. "How small would the material be? Make it modest! Make it appropriate! Do not distract them by forcing them to bunch up their unmentionables in order to be comfortable! Nor make them worry that their shame can be seen by all!"
Those at the next table moved across to another free table for reasons entirely unrelated to this conversation. Honest.
"Fine, fine, no snug shorts," Sayuri said, sounding dead inside.
"Noooo, come back!" Kashiko moaned, grasping at the air at an image only she could see, of her 'little brother' wearing the cute baseball uniform Sayuri had put her blood, sweat and tears into. She could almost see him, taking his cap off his adorable head, then wiping at his brow with the back of his hand. Ah, the thin white shirt clinging to his pectorals, the tiny shorts leaving nothing to the imagination... It was supreme! And, merely a dream. Ethereal, never to come to pass, such a cruel thing to take away from her.
But wait! Wait, wait! There was something. A means by which they could counterattack! Sayuri had thought of it before, but it had been less important to her than the team itself. Now, though... now it could open an avenue! Yes, she could expose Kuno's hypocrisy here and now, then use that as leverage to get what she wanted!
"Well, we're going to need to have some cheerleaders as well -" Sayuri began, flipping to the pages she had on this very subject matter. Kukuku, no way could he resist -
"I say thee naaaaay!" Kuno roared. "Cheerleaders are a western invention! Do not sully the good name of baseball with scantily clad girls skipping and frollicking around!"
Hold on, wait up here, so cheerleaders were western and baseball wasn't?
"Sh-Should we tell him?" Kashiko asked. Sayuri shrugged in confusion. He was saying no to cheerleaders?
"A distraction from the game and nothing more!" Kuno continued. Elsewhere, across town, a certain young girl felt like arrows were being fired into her back from a distance. "High kicks, bouncing around - Shameful to do so in public!" Fwip, fwip went the arrows.
"Well, I was thinking of asking Akane, or maybe that pigtailed girl from this morning to model some uniforms, but if you don't want us to -"
"Oh, in that case I am fully and totally on board with this idea, what sort of designs do you have in mind?" Kuno asked. "Please make the skirt as short and frilly as possible. Also, as snug as you can make it around the chest region. Exposing the navel is a definite plus!"
Ahaha, well, Sayuri had phrased it that way for a reason. She didn't say they *would* be doing that, only that she was thinking of asking them to model for them.
And even then, technically speaking, if they did say yes, the uniforms they’d be modeling would be much more towards the masculine fanservice persuasion… Ah Yuka would be so proud of her for corralling Kuno like this. Come to think of it, Nabiki probably would be as well...
<hr>
Nabiki's nose twitched, but she refused to sneeze. If she worked out who was thinking about her, she'd have to bill them for the inconvenience and discomfort. In any event, she'd arrived home a fair bit before a certain pair of gender flipping yet somehow sexy idiots who <i>very blatantly</i> wanted to bang but were too socially inept to figure out which tab A goes into which slot B. Not that Nabiki was complaining. Once others at Furinkan cottoned on, she'd be able to run a pool on it.
Her bet was F/F. Though all potential options seemed equally likely.
Anyway, here they came now. Traipsing in, both in girl form (promising, very promising for her read of the pool) fresh from their meeting with the club.
"So, how did the meeting go?" Nabiki absently asked. Conversationally. Digging for something she could needle them with.
"Hrmph! Well, I showed your sister up!" Ranma said triumphantly. "I'm the way better maid."
Nabiki had the misfortune of holding a glass of water in her hand. Its contents were shortly neither in her mouth or the glass after hearing that statement. Had she heard that correctly...?
"Better maid?”
“Yeah that Boys club challenged Akane, and some pink haired guy about some maid thing.” Ranma continued to explain. Unbidden, Nabiki immediately imagined boy form Akane in a maid outfit. A cute, frilly, French maid outfit. Replete with feather duster. A handsome, rippling mass of muscles packed into a cute uniform. Manly thighs held within garters... Who then turned towards her and winked.
"Oh goodness pardon me one moment I need to refill my glass," Nabiki said automatically, almost stumbling from the room while actually using the glass to catch the blood leaking from her nose. Urgh, avoided one anime cliche and fell right into another. That really was a cheap shot! She quickly rinsed that glass out, took a few deep breaths while leaning over the sink, and when she felt ready she went back out there.
"Hrm, I don't know, having you in girl form on that team kinda feels like it would defeat the point," Akane tapped her foot.
"Team...?" Nabiki asked.
"Yeah, we're playing a baseball game against St. Hebereke, and Akane wants to bench me! Can you believe it?"
A baseball game against St. Hebereke...? Nabiki tilted her head, and this time brought to mind Ranma wearing a baseball uniform, standing in the outfield. The pitcher makes their toss and - He leaps into the air, really cool, and effortlessly catches the ball!
Huh. Okay. No effect. That was -
"Not bench you," Akane said. "Actually, if you make such a cute maid, how about you cheer us on?"
"OH NO I FORGOT SOMETHING IN THE KITCHEN!" Nabiki turned and whirled around before her nose began to gush. Crap, crap, crap! She accidentally imagined girl form Ranma cheering while boy form Akane was running around a field in a snug pair of shorts! Too much stimulation! Far too much! Calm yourself, you're the Ice Queen, you're in control, don't let them get to you.
Relax.
Breathe.
Okay! You're good! And now that you're thinking clearly, you know exactly the method of your counterattack. That's good. Nabiki turned and marched right out there, and lay her weapon out.
"It sounds like you're going to have a lot of fun with this," she said. "A baseball game, my my. I'm sure the two of you will wind up working up quite the sweat. Working together, exerting yourselves in close proximity for probably hours while wearing tight, snug clothing..."
You could almost hear the sound of a metal bar dropping inside both of their heads.
"Ah... excuse me, I have to... Do a thing," Ranma said.
"Me too!" Akane said, her voice an octave higher than normal. "I forgot this... very important thing I have to do. In my room. Alone."
The two of them separated and Nabiki resumed sitting down in the rather unseasonably warm night, enjoying her fresh cool glass of water. Ah! That was good! Let's ignore the implications of her having that reaction to girl form Ranma and the boy form of her own little sister, because those are implications she'd rather not dwell on <i>right now</i> thanks.
Oh, and here comes Kasumi. "Did I hear Ranma and Akane come in?" she asked.
"Not yet, but soon," Nabiki replied. "They'll be coming very soon." Probably best she didn't know the details of that statement. Ah, it was good to be the Queen.
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