Ucchan’s was a modest okonomiyaki restaurant that did quite well for itself considering that its only chef spent considerable time at school. It was a testament to Ukyo’s cooking, business acumen, or perhaps even sheer dumb luck. Maybe a combination of all three.
Konatsu didn’t care which it was. All he cared about was working hard to make Miss Ukyo happy! Because working hard meant that their clients were more likely to be satisfied, and the more satisfied they were when they left the happier Miss Ukyo was! Seeing her smile filled his own heart with joy and merriment, for he truly did love her. He loved that beautiful and kind chef in a way he could never have imagined possible!
On this particular day when Ukyo skipped downstairs, the smile she wielded would require his heart to triple in size to contain all of that joy and merriment.
“Good morning, Miss Ukyo!” Konatsu bowed deeply to her, his mind racing with how completely radiant she appeared today! Even as compared to other days there was a glow about her. A glow that he feared might burn his eyes if he stared too long; and yet stare he must, as a moth was drawn inexorably to a flame.
“Good morning, Konatsu!” Ukyo replied. “You look especially cute today!”
And then she skipped over and hugged him. The joy and merriment was now threatening to burst from his chest. Burst free into the world in a shower of gore and euphoria. Konatsu could do little more than sigh into the hug and breathed in a heady aroma that reminded him of a field of flowers.
“That smell… is it a new perfume?” he asked.
“Hm?” Ukyo hummed, idly twirling a stray strand of her still slightly damp hair. “Oh! You must mean my new scented body wash. I swear, I haven’t felt this good in years!”
Oh, yes. Konatsu could certainly see that. Her body language indicated that every muscle had recently undergone a massive release of tension. Her complexion was clearer, and given the way she kept laughing to herself under her breath it must have been some sort of miracle worker.
“You should totally try this stuff out for yourself,” Ukyo said. “It’s sorta like, you know, a spa in a bottle.”
“I could not possibly indulge in such a whim! I am but a poor kunoichi, and to use such an extravagant substance on my body would surely be a waste!”
“Oh? Aren’t I your employer? If I say use it, then use it. Next time you bathe, I really don’t mind. It’s that cute little heart-shaped bottle.”
A direct instruction from his employer was impossible to ignore, which meant that the conversation was at an end. Just as well, because their first customer of the day was just at that moment opening the door!
“Welcome to Ucchan’s!” Konatsu said, warmly greeting the customer with a practised and polished charm. “Please take a seat and we shall serve you shortly!”
The customer did not, as instructed, take a seat. Instead she stared at Konatsu, which unnerved him enough to stare back at her and attempt to evaluate whether or not she was a threat without weakening that warm and welcoming smile.
She was about his own age, Ukyo’s as well for that matter. She had long blonde hair, the sort that made the sun itself envious with how bright, beautiful and yellow it was. Her eyes sparkled with a perpetual amusement as though everything she saw was tremendously entertaining, a sentiment shared by her full and luscious lips. Her clothing made it seem quite impossible that she was carrying a weapon but Konatsu found that particularly suspicious as well - a tight, sleeveless shirt that didn’t even come close to covering her navel was stretched over breasts that were far above her frame’s average. Possibly the weapons store was in there? It was a trick Konatsu had used in the past, after all. There certainly wasn’t anywhere to hide anything strapped to either of her bare legs. Not with that frilly mini-skirt she was wearing. Perhaps something in her shoes - ah of course - the heels themselves might make for a very deadly weapon!
The girl reached out a hand, and Konatsu watched it carefully to see what she did with it. He might be wrong. She might not be a threat. He might just be feeling a bit paranoid in response to how wonderfully Miss Ukyo had made him feel earlier. There was nothing in it, but the girl was reaching for his face. Not with any particular speed or precision, and she wasn’t going anywhere near a vital point. So why was she -
“You are soooo cute!” the girl said, lightly pinching Konatsu’s cheeks with a playful giggle. She sidestepped around him while he rubbed at the now tender location, and eeped slightly when he felt a hand glide over his rear end.
Oh, dear! The girl really was a threat… though perhaps not the kind Konatsu had been expecting.
“Hiya, Ukyo!” the girl chirped while waving cheerily. She skipped over to a seat on the counter and elegantly sat upon it. “So? Didja use the body wash?”
“I sure did!” Ukyo replied in an oddly sing-song voice. “You were so right! I feel like I’m bursting with energy! That stuff is amazing!”
“Toldja you’d totally love it,” the girl giggled. “It only gets better the more you use it. In a week’s time, Ranma won’t be able to keep his hands off you!”
It was quite the testament to Konatsu’s self control that he did not sigh wearily upon hearing that recommendation, nor did he respond to or even appear to acknowledge Ukyo’s reaction to that final statement. Internally he was a little disappointed. Did she truly believe that was all it would take to win his affections? Did she truly believe details like a gleamingly clean complexion and intoxicating aroma would entice anyone that was not already interested in her? She was already quite beautiful and very much physically desirable. All that the body wash had done was place a further emphasis on pre-existing facts. If Ranma - or indeed anyone at all - fell in love with her based on that alone, then surely it was a shallow relationship that would fail the first time the hot water broke down!
Which would surely frustrate Ranma for entirely different reasons anyway, but that was a bit of a digression.
Many people might have leaped forward in that same situation and said “No! I am already in love with you! Please, allow me to help you, permit me to be with you! I am yours for now and forever!” But Konatsu was smart - or at least insecure - enough to realise this was a failing tactic. He had not fallen in love with this wonderful woman due to lustful feelings. It was her kindness, her generosity that had won him over. If she truly wanted Ranma to love her the way Konatsu did, it would take more than a quick fix. The two of them were very different people. The two of them wanted very different things in their romantic interests. The two of them had fallen in love with very different strong-headed women.
“I’ll see him later on,” Ukyo said, once again twirling her hair in a playful manner. Curious habit to pick up, now that he thought about it. “There’s supposed to be some sorta takeout race going on this afternoon, and I invited him to watch.”
“You are gonna have so much fun!” the strange girl merrily clapped and laughed. “Show the rest of ‘em up! It’ll turn his head for sure, seeing you totally win that race!”
“Hmph! My only real competition is, like, that Chinese bimbo! But I’ll totally sort her out, no trouble!”
To emphasise her point a little Ukyo picked up a bucket, which rather gave the game away. Oh, yes, it wasn’t too hard to work out what her grand plan was likely to be. A little splash of cold water would surely make it very difficult for the girl, because all it would take would be a little bit to turn her into a cat. Then she’d lose the race by dropping her dish - and even if she did manage somehow to prevent that from happening she would probably wind up being disqualified or falling behind while searching for hot water.
“If there’s anything I can do to help,” the cheery blonde said, “Just ask, and I’m your girl!”
<hr>
The morning drove on a little, and, as is inevitable, lunchtime soon rolled around. Konatsu was kept rather busier than usual during the morning and didn’t have much time to think about what his rather excellent hearing could make out happening upstairs. Running water. Lots of running water. Goodness, such a waste! The bill would surely be terrible for that much!
But he would be kept busy in a quite different manner that afternoon. The girl reappeared down the stairs, and beckoned for Konatsu. He didn’t need any explanation. He had been there a few hours before when the plan had been made.
“As I am to understand it,” Konatsu said while staring down at the - for some reason pinkish - bottles littering the bathroom floor. “I am to take these bottles and set up water traps for Miss Shampoo.”
“Uh huh!” the girl said, not really paying him any attention. “You’re, like, a ninja or something. So, you should be totally amazing at setting traps and stuff.”
“I am a kunoichi,” he said. The girl may be a friend of Miss Ukyo’s, but in his far too humble opinion she was not particularly bright.
“Yeah, whatevs. Best get going! You only have two hours to set up these traps.”
It wasn’t difficult to gather up the bottles, and various ideas were already formed in his head about what he could do with a few of these. Part of the problem was, Shampoo was quite the talented martial artist - which meant she could wind up taking any route to the finish. Oh, dear. It was a little bit cruel to cheat in such a manner, but Miss Ukyo did so very much want to win this race. The thought of her smile - which had not dropped from her lips even once this morning - turning to him, telling him “Good job!” and maybe even getting another hug? Why, it was too much to ask for! But a kunoichi’s reward was simply to obey instructions. A kunoichi’s praise was the satisfaction of knowing a job was performed.
And so Konatsu rapidly changed out of his waitress outfit, revealing his kunoichi gear worn underneath (and eeked a little when the girl somehow managed to rub her hand up his thigh and touch - Oh goodness, so inappropriate - without him noticing until it was too late!), strapped the bottles around the outfit. He then leaped out of the window to sneak off towards the race track to set some traps without another thought.
Well. Maybe one other thought. “Why is the water pink, and why does it smell of flowers?”
Back in Ukyo’s bathroom, the girl watched him leave while licking her lips. She stepped towards the door, but backed off just a little bit and scooped up the little pink heart-shaped bottle. The cap was flipped open the bottle upended and a dollop of the wash was squeezed onto her upturned palm.
“Oh, god!” she moaned as the wash was applied to her face, covering it in a single thick layer. “Come back soon, cutie! We’ll have soooo much fun, just the three of us!”
- The race begins, and Shampoo is quickly drenched in a body wash and cold water mix.
- The race begins, and Shampoo doesn’t get drenched… but others do!
- The mystery girl convinces Ukyo to take a bath before the big race. A bath which the two of them share.
- Konatsu returns after setting the traps, and is ambushed by the mystery girl. Who is she really?
- Something else
Cute scene.
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