Sunday, 22 September 2019

Story: Tsundere Thighs


Have you ever stood in a dark room, lit a match so you could see, then realised you were in a gunpowder warehouse? That right about described the mood in the Tendo family kitchen right about now. It's not hard to see why. Shampoo and Kasumi could only watch with bated breath as the freshly thiccened boy and girl bickered and argued right before their eyes.

"Oh, look at what you've done now!" Akane huffed. She turned up her nose and put her hand on her hips, which made her chest jiggle as if it was looking for an excuse to do so. "You've gone and made us thicc and sexy again!"

"That sexy part must be new for you," Ranma said. He flexed his bicep, and it was as big as his head. "Thicc, not so much."

"Really?" Akane asked. "I think I have way more sex appeal normally than you think!"

"Akane right!" Shampoo interrupted. "Akane bang Shampoo last night. Rock her world, it amazing!" The Chinese girl sighed blissfully. "She much more bold than Airen.... Recognise good thing when she see it."

Akane, for her part, slapped her hand right into her face. Ranma, for his part, glared daggers at Akane. "Oy, oy! What's this? You and Shampoo hooked up?" Ranma asked. "Is that so? Is that so? What about all those times where you accused me of being a pervert because she snuck into bed with me?"

"This is different," Akane insisted. "I was under a spell! In case you haven't noticed, these forms are extremely sexually aggressive."

Case in point, while speaking Ranma and Akane had stepped quite a bit closer to one another. They were still scowling at one another, and looking like they were thinking of the next mean thing to say.. But they were also… touching each other. In a way that was clearly intended as sexual, but could also be seen as "I am about to judo throw you through plate glass given half the opportunity." Right up until they got close enough to each other that a sliver of light couldn't penetrate, and Akane had her leg hooked around Ranma's waist while he was steadying her with a hand on her thigh. Put it like that and it sounds extremely sexual, right? Like they're gonna collapse to the floor and screw each other senseless, right?

Well, that's ignoring that Ranma's other hand was on her shoulder while Akane's were hooked under his forearms, which turned the pose from sexually suggestive to, again 'I'ma toss you.'

"Pervert," Akane accused. She adjusted her position, slipping her foot back so she was steadier. Which had the side effect of grinding her crotch up against his.

"You lookin' in a mirror or something?" Ranma replied. Their hands then slipped down the other's bodies, Ranma's hand grabbing Akane's collar while her hands grabbed his sleeves -

"No fighting in the kitchen!" Kasumi interrupted, deftly pulling the two apart with all the experience of a martial artist household's housewife. Despite not being a wife. Though if she had her way she’d be telling a particular thicc person <i>‘Do you want a bath, meal, or me?’</i> again and again. "Now Akane, it's not right to have lesbian sex with your fiance's fiancee."

Take a moment to marvel at that sentence and understand the level of weirdness that permeates their lives that it is positively mundane compared to some of the weird shit that comes their way.

"See! Kasumi gets it!" Ranma stuck out his tongue.

"And Ranma," Kasumi said, and she quite deliberately backed up into his business. "Could you please... do that thing again. One look at this thicc body of yours, and I can't help myself..."

The expression on Akane's face can be best summarised as 'really?'. Take the word 'really' and add the question mark to it, and imagine what that face looks like. Akane had the very embodiment of that expression. You could not find a better example of the platonic ideal of 'really?' anywhere in history.

"Oh I see how it is!" Akane yelled. "I spend the night with Shampoo wearing me like a feeding bag, and it's the worst thing ever! But then you go and bang my older sister?! Who, need I remind you, I lost my first crush to!"

Ranma would love to come up with a rebuttal to that point. Except for one small problem. Having Kasumi Tendo in a bathrobe grind her body into yours was distracting enough as it is. But at the same time...

"Could you go back to that feeding bag comment for a bit, I need to clarify exactly what you meant by that."

“It mean Shampoo eat Akane’s pussy all night with thighs wrapped around Shampoo’s head.” Shampoo said, now grinding into Akane’s back. Ah, yes. That was an image that appeared in Ranma’s head and suddenly couldn’t leave. Try to form an argument in this situation and see how far you get.

Fortunately, Ranma was recognising his current vulnerability and decided to do something about it. There was a glass of water sitting on the counter nearby. His hand reached out for it, and he tipped it over his head, triggering his curse and becoming a girl.

"Alright! That's more like it," girl form Ranma said. "Now we can argue without my blood rushing elsewhere, this should really help!"

"Buh...." Akane mumbled, showing the key problem Ranma's plan had vis a vis continuing the argument. You see, in this form Ranma's thicc chest was already straining against the fabric of her tank top as it was. But throw some water on top of it and now it was clinging to her chest.

If you think it's difficult concentrating in Ranma's situation try staring at wet thicc girl Ranma while Shampoo is groping you, and alternating between kissing your neck and discussing the dirty, dirty sex you had with her all night long. If you're lucky you might get enough brainpower going to figure out what one added to one equals.

"Oh my, the only thing that's likely to help is a lesbian orgy..." Kasumi sighed, stepping aside and knowing that she should probably do something else to stop this but being utterly prevented by her newly awakened libido kind of wanting to see where this goes.

"So as I was saying, turning thicc was the only way you were ever getting some," Ranma scoffed. "This spell was the best thing to happen to you. To me as well! Now I get two violent girls out of my hair."

"Akane going to take that?" Shampoo whispered, then smacked Akane on her ass. "Ooh... Can feel it jiggling under Shampoo's touch..."

At that point something in Akane lead her to smack Shampoo right back on her rear, harder, despite being behind Akane. “Bad kitty!” She said automatically. "I mean! I'll have you know my milkshake brought all the boys to the yard before you showed up!"

"Hey, that song's not come out yet, this is supposed to be either the late 80s or early 90s," Ranma hissed. "Anyway! When I showed up, they got a taste of a better milkshake!"

"Oh yeah!"

"Yeah!"

By now, the two of them were in a reversal of the position they'd been in earlier. Ranma's leg was hooked around Akane's waist, with Akane's hand on Ranma's thigh. The main difference this time being, Shampoo sauntering around the two of them and tugging their trousers down - then nudging their bodies over to the floor.

"Shampoo bet New Airen Akane much better lover than Old Airen Ranma!" she chirped, knowing full well what would result from such a statement.

"This clumsy girl! I'll show her how it goes!" Ranma pulled AKane close enough that they were only not kissing by technicality.

"Yeah right! I bet you don't know the first thing about a real girl's ooooh boy!" Akane’s insult was interrupted by Ranma kissing her neck, going down to the top of her chest.

"You were saying?" Ranma smirked. "I'll have you admitting who is better at this in no time - Yipes!" Then Akane’s hand went down between Ranma’s legs. Something Akane had gotten a lot of experience fingering last night.

"Just like a boy!" Akane sniffed. "So cocky, so sure of your superiority, you're bound to blow your load far. Too. Fast."

"They're... not turning back," Kasumi said. Shampoo offered her some popcorn, and Kasumi took a handful while unable to take her eyes off the sight in front of her. "I thought they should turn back if they are affectionate to each other."

"They still insult each other," Shampoo said. "That keep it tsundere enough, Shampoo suppose? Oh no, they're starting to get into it!"

"Akane! I suppose this means you want to marry Ranma, right?" Kasumi asked.

"Me, marry this jerk! Never!"

"Who - who would want to marry you anyway! All you’d do is run off your mouth!"

“I’ll show you what my mouth can do!” Akane then got down onto her knees, ready to use Ranma’s thighs like braces while she had an unusual breakfast.


Both Kasumi and Shampoo breathed a sigh of relief. This was way too hot for them to end so soon. Watching Akane's head disappear in between Ranma's thicc, glorious thighs,  those legs wrapping around the other girl's head. Taking in the sight of their chests heaving and glistening with sweat... Watching this passion, this heat play out in front of them was almost better than the...

No, no, that was the two of them living in the moment, on a more objective analysis the sex last night was way, way better. This was still turning their engines something fierce but watching wasn't anywhere near as much fun as participating.

"Ohhh... Akane!" Ranma moaned, and then she came, and apparently since they hadn't insulted each other for at least thirty seconds while Akane ate her out the two of them sort of... deflated back to normal.

Now the two of them were there in the kitchen. Both of them naked. They took one look at each other, and if you blinked you'd miss them both fleeing from the room towards parts unknown.

Moments later Nabiki wandered in, fully dressed and stretching.

"What's with you two?" Nabiki asked. She waved her hand in front of both Kasumi and Shampoo's faces. "Why the popcorn? What were you -"

Then she noticed the clothes discarded on the floor.

"Dammit, I missed something so hot it would redefine my sexuality for the rest of my life again, didn't I?"

Both Kasumi and Shampoo nodded, mutely.

<i>”Fuck.”</i>

Yes. Yes they had.


  1. Ranma and Akane spend the rest of the day trying to avoid each other.
  2. The two of them both independently run into people they immediately tsun.
  3. Kasumi and Shampoo go after them for some more nookie.
  4. Nabiki doesn't care which of them fucks her, but by god she's getting fucked by some thicc booty by day's end.
  5. Something else

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