It’s an old saying that hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Well, a woman scorned hath no fury like a girlfriend that just had sex with her boyfriend, then discovered that he’d just screwed a bunch of alien chicks that were in the middle of taking over the planet Earth and he just casually brings it up like it’s no big thing as if she was supposed to be okay with it, or worse yet was actually bragging about how much pussy he was getting today like the thoughtless hapless idiot that he really was. Dumbass pervert!
There is a wrestling position called a “gorilla press”. To set up this position, the attacking wrestler would pick the opponent up above their head using both hands and hold them there with one arm on the sternum and the other on the legs. The effect is sort of like, say, imagine you had a gorilla picking up a log and holding it over its head. It’s often used to illustrate the power of the attacking wrestler, as it is quite an impressive visual spectacle.
Of course there really isn’t anything actually holding the victim of this move in position. If they wanted they could theoretically roll out of the way, try to land on their feet. Not so much in Ataru’s case. Because Shinobu was pretty freakishly strong when suitably pissed off, and… Well, read the first paragraph. Not only was she lifting Ataru up above her head in the gorilla press pose, but she was also keeping a pretty firm grip on his head and legs.
“Ah! Shinobu! Put me down!” he cried. “This is a little kinkier than I -”
“You had sex with the aliens invading our planet!” Shinobu interrupted. “I was supposed to be your first! Me! Care to tell me what you were thinking?”
“He was thinking that maybe if he rocked that sexy alien’s galaxy, he might be able to save your planet from alien occupation,” replied a voice that Shinobu really, really didn’t want to hear just then. It appeared as though the alien had recovered, and if there’s anything that a woman hates more than the man that cheated on her it’s the woman he did it with. To this effect, Shinobu dropped Ataru behind herself. He was fine, he was able to land on his feet, but he at least had the common sense to stay quiet while Shinobu and Lum stalked over towards each other.
She got right in Lum’s face to start with. She reached out her hand, groped Lum’s breast and said “Bang!” with the kind of satisfaction you can only get in the midst of a little bit of harmless cold-blooded vengeance.
But Lum didn’t do much more than shiver a little in pleasure, leaving Shinobu to realise that her bare hand was touching Lum’s bare chest. She remembered just a little too late that during the excitement with Ataru she had tossed all of her clothing away. Including the gloves.
“Bang,” Lum said, and Shinobu’s knees buckled underneath her as uncontrollable laughter spilled from her still furious lips. “Mmm, I have to remember this use for the - bang - gloves. Tcha! To think we never tried this before!”
“Hahaha! St-stop it! Cut it out!”
Her nemesis didn’t even try to relent. She ran her hand gleefully across Shinobu’s body, squeezing her breasts, caressing her taut stomach, trailing unstoppable mirth down her butt, her legs, her feet, rubbing seemingly every inch of her with those damned gloves.
But she wouldn’t give in! No matter what. All she had to do was keep Lum from saying that word. Triggering that laughing response from her, making her body so, so sensitive…
So she leaped forwards and took Lum’s lips in an amazing feat of strength and will! There! That shut her up. No more “bang!” No more words from the alien, no more tickling gloves, no more unstoppable laughter. Just the two of them. Pressing their lips together. Holding each other’s bodies close. Which left Shinobu with just one question left to ponder. What now?
Strange thing was, she wasn’t exactly angry anymore. It’s actually kind of difficult to maintain that level of raw fury when your body keeps on laughing against its own will. Each “bang” had drained her adrenaline rush, or at least made it rush into an entirely different place. She couldn’t even muster the strength to be annoyed anymore. It didn’t exactly hurt that Lum had met her enthusiasm and equalled it, returning the kiss with skill and energy that left her head feeling a little bit woozy, and sort of forgetting why she was even annoyed in the first place.
“Hot!”
Oh wait, there it was. Shinobu grabbed the gloves and tossed them to the other side of the room, then glared back at her boyfriend, freely breaking her lips away now that she was safe once again.
“So you find this ‘hot’, do you? Watching two girls go at it?” she asked with a careful tone. “Fine. Then you just stay there and watch as I give these alien girls a screwing that will make them question why they should ever bother with men in the first place! You go home and get a nice night’s sleep, I’m going to keep her up all. Night. Long.”
“Please, as if you could possibly - Ah! Okay, maybe you can, are all humans this good at sex? We should have invaded years ago!”
“Tch,” Shinobu tutted, waving around the index finger of her spare hand. The other was just a little bit preoccupied somewhere a lot warmer and wetter at that moment. “You shouldn’t underestimate us humans, we’re stronger than you think!”
“And you shouldn’t underestimate us Oni either!” Lum called, and all of a sudden their positions were reversed and Shinobu wasn’t entirely sure what had happened. All that she remembered was Lum’s now bare hand tracing around her hips, and then everything turned white for a second and now she was on her back while Lum’s fingers pumped furiously into her. “Mmm… It’s going to be fun visiting this planet when we’re done here,” Lum whispered in between playful nibbles of Shinobu’s ear. “Such a shame we won’t be conquering you now.”
“You - You’re not?”
“‘Course not. I promisedcha! We’ll talk about that later, for right now we’re going to have some fun…”
“… So hot!” said the idiot.
- Benten and Oyuki get in on the fun.
- The next day, Lum throws the tag race deliberately.
- Aftermath of Lum throwing the tag race.
- Things don’t go quite to plan.
- Something else
The first paragraph made me chuckle. By the 3rd I was roaring with laughter.
ReplyDeleteAs for continuation, I'm for 2 or 3.