It’s harder work doing retail than most people realise. It bounces between boredom and assholes faster than you can blink. You’re either going through the motions, or taking nonsense from a member of the general public. And let’s be honest. The average person is a self-centred prick even on a good day. But you gotta be polite, gotta follow company policies, gotta keep those people happy. It really is a tough juggling act. It wears you down, makes you question if the pay is even worth it. So maybe give a thought to the rough day the clerks at your local retail store have on each and every shift they work the next time you get annoyed at the company, and try to remember that they wield absolutely no power at all.
Today, the clerks at one store would find it all worth it. Just for one day, just for one customer. She stepped into the store like a bolt of lightning. The clerk nearest the door merely glanced at her and completely forgot how to make his mouth say “hello.”
Because this was not a member of the public. This was a Goddess come to grace the Earth and the very ground she stepped on. Her red hair cascaded down her back like a regal cloak. A Chinese shirt was the only item of clothing she appeared to be wearing. Her figure, her face, her everything was simply irresistible.
This Goddess was, of course, girl-form Ranma. She turned to the greeter and, in the same manner that she would use to con free parfaits, balled her fists under her chin, made her eyes as big and shiny and fluttering as she could possibly make them, smiled the biggest smile you ever saw smiled and, having achieved the very image of adorable sexiness, spoke up in the most deliberately over-the-top girly voice imaginable.
“Hi there, handsome!” she cutely cooed, leaning towards him in a manner that, had anyone else done it, might have seemed over the top, a clear and blatant performance. But when she did it? It was perfect. Believable. Nosebleed inducing. “Oh, woe is me! I am in such a dire situation! I have such wonderful plans, but I don’t have a <i>thing</I> to wear!”
“Plans?” the clerk swallowed. “P-Plans with a boyfriend?”
“Why?” Ranma replied, trailing a finger up his chest until it reached his jaw, where she snapped it shut for him. “Are you offering?”
Which is when the clerk fainted with a smile on his face. Was it because she touched him, or because she flirted with him? Why not both? Either was enough reason by itself. Ranma cushioned the blow a little bit in case he hit his head off those shelves he was standing in front of, then shrugged and continued on into the store, where she stood in the middle and smiled.
Now, it isn’t this author’s intention to dwell on any particular points that should already be made quite thoroughly clear to any reader. The wish had transformed Ranma’s girl form into sexual perfection. Okay, you get that. You understand it. We could spend all day writing poetry about her breasts, her waist, her butt, her legs, her face, her hair or indeed any part of her body you could care to stare at for hours at a time, captured by its beauty in a manner similar to Narcissus with his own reflection or Pygmalion’s fascination with his statue. You get it. You understand it. Fine. But here’s another example of how drop-dead gorgeous Ranma was now. All eyes were on her the second she walked into the store. You get that. You understand that.
Yet did you understand that nobody in that store even noticed the beautiful middle-aged woman standing next to her at every step along the way? You could think of it like a reverse perception filter: All eyes were on Ranma, meaning nobody was paying the slightest bit of mind to anything else around her, so that when she gently patted Ranma on the back of the head it was as though she had appeared out of nowhere.
“Now, now, Ranko,” Nodoka said. “I understand you might be in a bit of a playful mood, but that’s no reason to toy with a young man’s heart.”
“I’m sorry!” Ranma - Excuse me, Ranko - replied, cutely batting her eyes in imitation of a scolded puppy. “You saw the way he was staring at me! I could hardly stop myself.”
“Well, given the way you are dressed…” Nodoka sighed. “I am sorry, I shouldn’t criticise. I know you were attacked by some lunatic gymnast martial artist, and she shredded your trousers during the attack. However, that is quite a provocative and unladylike look… If you want a worthwhile man, you should consider behaving more like a lady and less like a tomboy.”
“It’s funny,” Ranko mused, checking out a cute skirt that would have boys tripping over themselves to spend time with her. Which also described every other item of clothing in the store, including the store uniform. “I’ve been telling Akane that for some time….”
<hr>
Speaking of Akane, she was busily engaging herself in activities that would ensure any man that saw them would devote the rest of their natural lives to serving her every whim. Then again, they would be rather torn between feeling that and serving the other three girls with equal fervour given the nature of what was actually happening just now.
It is a bit of a mystery why it is that the observation of gay or lesbian behaviour can be so arousing to the opposite sex. A man watching two women scissor is unlikely to get laid by either one. Yet there it is. It has the most profound impact on the straight male libido. Maybe it’s less because they’re imagining themselves getting involved in the activity, and more to do with how there are now double the boobs? Strange. You wouldn’t think mathematics would enter the realm of eroticism outside of very specific fetishes…
Ah, but that was a digression: The point remains that Shampoo had a tight grip on Akane’s leg and was rather furiously thrusting her pussy up against her rival’s; nearby, Kodachi was writhing in ecstasy while Ukyo ate her out, the latter fingering herself to the same rhythm as Kodachi’s whimpers and moans.
“W-Wait! Oh god, that’s good! But wait!” Akane said between bouts of thunderous orgasms. “Time out! Time out already!”
“Shampoo always know Akane have no stamina.”
Akane growled a little bit, her competitive nature rearing its ugly head. Well, thanks to the wish even that ugly head was only a comparison to otherwise. It would still make a supermodel look plain by comparison.
“That’s not what I meant,” Akane said, trying to stand up and failing due to Shampoo gripping her leg. “We’re not getting anywhere like this.”
“Except ‘off’,” Ukyo said. “But you know, she’s right. It’s kind of exciting that we could be arrested at any moment, but this ain’t gonna resolve a single damn thing!”
“As if a peasant like you could think of a better way to - Oh! Oh my, yes!”
“Anyway!” Ukyo continued, vigorously fingering Kodachi to keep the nutjob quiet. Well. Incoherent would be more accurate. “So long as we keep each other… occupied like this, none of us are actually getting the prize. Ranma’s run off god only knows where, while we’re all screwing like horny, sexy rabbits.”
“What you suggest?” Shampoo sniffed. “We all share airen? That probably kill him in week.”
“Or maybe we could all just, you know, enjoy each other <i>and</i> him?” Akane suggested.
The three girls still lucid enough to consider that did so for a moment in silence, then laughed.
“That funny!” Shampoo said, wiping a tear from her eye. “This not cheap porn! We kill each other or airen inside two days! Too, too stupid idea!”
“Then it’s settled,” Akane said. “Only one of us can have that boy-slash-girl. As much fun as it would be to kick your perfect asses, a martial arts contest doesn’t seem appropriate… And screwing in the street doesn’t seem to be getting us anywhere.”
“Alright,” Ukyo said. “Then we’ll win Ranma over some other way. How about… First to have male Ranma cum inside of them gets first crack at a relationship with him? I think that seems fair. We all split up and try to find and nail him.”
“You’re on!” Akane and Shampoo said at once. Of course, Akane had already actually technically won that challenge, but she wasn’t exactly the rules lawyer type to begin with. So their final game was set in motion, and… Come to think of it, a competition like this might well wind up with Ranma in hospital in any event. Where these four were concerned anything was possible!
- Ranma is clothes shopping with Nodoka, they pick out some outfits, advice is given on attracting “the right sort of man.”
- … Except that some hot water finds its way to Ranma somehow.
- … Or Nodoka is being more influenced by Ranma’s sheer sexiness than first appears.
- The girls begin their search.
- Something else
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