The plan for today was to get away from all the craziness. The plan was to take a break, do something to feel ordinary. Feel like a girl for a little while! Try not to let this male body and its male hormones and its male penis absolutely dominate her life. Help her retain some semblance of sanity, self control and normalcy, so that when she does inevitably return to her own world, she's able to adjust again.
There was more to it than that, but getting into the subtle nuances and psychological analysis for why this was something she was doing would take forever, and somewhat detract away from the essential, important point: Akane was on a date with Ranma, at the cat cafe, and Shampoo was being extremely supportive about it.
Let's digest those points one at a time to help properly understand her headspace right now. Firstly! A proper, official date with Ranma, where neither of their fathers were anywhere in sight. Where he was being a charming, proper gentleman, and -
"You know, you're really cute, I'm surprised I've not seen you around before."
And complimenting her looks! Guh! This was a problem, a very big problem. Ranma was a handsome guy, and when he really wanted to tidy up he did so to an amazing degree! He could be charming, he could be extremely sweet, and that's why she got frustrated with him all the damn time because he never, ever seemed to show it to her!
With him being super nice on this date, it was making her girly bits go 'yay let's bang!' because the physical attraction was mutual, she knew him really, really, really well and enjoyed hanging out with him, and - Ohhh, everything else was justification after the fact. It felt like she was going nuts though!
"Here is menu!" Shampoo chirped, handing a menu over to them and giving Akane a saucy wink. Really?! Oh, she was onto your game missy, you're trying to set them up so you could get Akane's boy form all to yourself! Although, her eyes trailed after that body as it was walking away and -
No! Bad thoughts, very bad thoughts! Focus on the menu, focus on the -
<i>"Ranma is a leg guy, but pretends to be a boob guy" Heart, smiley face. Written on the margins. Ohhh, but that was a deep nervous twitch on Akane's face right now, she could feel herself turning scarlet and -
"Hey, let's pick out something together," Ranma said. Scooting over! Putting an arm around her shoulder! Normally she'd punt him into the stratosphere if he tried something like this, but today? She was leaning! Into! Him! Internal screaming, internal yelling, so much internal yelling!
Akane shut the menu so he didn't see that message. Guh! This was embarrassing enough already! "Oh, I'm sure whatever you want to have will be fine!" she said. "Why don't you pick for me? I think you know this place better, right?"
"I don't know, you seem pretty familiar with the waitress..." Cologne said while hopping by on her stick, cackling like a loon. She was enjoying this too much. Way, way too much! Oh no... This was bad. This was really, really bad! This was like - like the time Shampoo rather blatantly tried to set her up with Ryoga so that she could get with Ranma herself. Except worse! Shampoo had no idea that she was setting up the very boy that she was into, with the girl that she was trying to take the boy from, and -
Oh dear she'd gone cross eyed. This situation couldn't get much more hectic, manic, or confusing than -
"Ohohohohohoho!"
"Will you stop laughing?!"
Of course, she practically asked for that one. In they come, two of them at once, Kodachi and Ukyo, spoiling for a fight. Akane tensed up on reflex, when you get this group together in the same room it rarely ends well. Scratch that. It never, ever ends well. There's usually at least one explosion, probably one person - make that probably Ranma - getting knocked out, left scuffed up and helpless, and also someone would wind up having to pay for the damages.
Her body tensed. She was ready for a fight. Practically spoiling for it. Actually, she felt a bit angrier than normal here. She was thinking, you know, here she was on an actual date with Ranma. Kinda enjoying herself. Playing footsie under the table, leaning into his strong lean and muscular body, his hand on her shoulder, arm behind the back of her head. She... felt like a girl. For the first time in a while. She wanted to stay right here, and these bitches were about to ruin her -
"Hey Ranchan, have you seen Akane anywhere?" Ukyo asked, friendly as you like.
"Indeed," Kodachi sniffed haughtily. "My beloved Akane darling is nowhere to be seen! If I discover this cafe is hiding him..."
"Oh, don't worry," Cologne said with a knowing smirk. "We're not hiding <b>him</b> by any means." Enjoying that wordplay were you? At this point Akane almost wanted them to notice because that was so, so dumb. But no. They seemed quite oblivious. "Now if you don't mind, Ranma and this charming young girl were on a date - what was your name again?"
"Usagi," Akane said through grit teeth. "Usagi Tsukino."
"What, like Sailor Moon?" Ukyo asked.
"Yeah, I get that a lot," Akane replied. "I shoulda had my hair tied up in odango style, I guess."
"Nah, short hair suits you better," Ranma said. Then pulled her closer! Nooo stop, if you didn't stop then Akane was going to do something very, very stupid and soon! "Anyway, I've not seen Akane anywhere today, can you clear off? I really wanna get to know this chick better. She's so... interesting."
What was that? What was that look between Ukyo and Kodachi? That nod, too! It was a silent agreement, wasn't it? What kind of agreement had you just made?!
"Super happy for you Ranchan!" said the girl that was supposedly Ranma's main fiance this time around! "I'm sure you'll get on better with her than you do with Nabiki any day!"
"Indeed," Kodachi said. "And furthermore, have this special gift on me, find somewhere private to finish your date. Now, do be sure to send Akane our way if you run into him, do you hear me Saotome?"
Kodachi had just dropped an envelope fat with cash right there on the table. Ohhhhh, boy. And now they were sitting at a table not too far away, alongside Shampoo, the three of them giving conspiratorial little glances in this direction while Ranma was snuggling up against her, making her feel good and giddy and -
And she was getting laid later on, wasn't she? Why was she so horny in this universe?!
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