Story: Oversynch

 

And so, we return to horny Monopoly.

At the moment, all three of them were in a deep state of undress having paid much of their clothing - which, in this game, is their currency - to the bank. 

"Pilot Ikari, I wish to make a trade," Rei said. The statement hung heavy in the room. As heavy as the pendulous, jiggling bosoms of the two girls hung. Shinji gulped, knowing that Rei was in his head as surely as he was in hers. "I will trade you -"

"Hold on a sec," Asuka interrupted. "Urgh, I can't believe I have to explain this... Listen. There is no such thing as a truly equal deal. One person is getting slightly ahead of the other, somehow. The trick to a great deal is making the other person think they're the one that's getting ahead, and that doesn't exactly work here, you know?"

There was a logic to that. But deals like this were a vital part of the game. Which was annoying. They'd picked this game for the sole purpose of having a game which didn't rely on closed information, everything would be out in the open, but... She was right. They'd overlooked that one little thing. In order to trick someone into giving you what you want, you've got to keep your cards close to your chest. Which meant even this game - fun though it might be - still wasn't quite good enough to meet their needs...

<hr>

Maya fidgeted a bit while sitting in the LCL pod. She really didn't know what to make of this. To think that Doctor Ikagi, her beloved senpai, would request that she take the role of a control for an experiment around Synch Data! That was an important part of science, you see. A control is needed to help keep everything fair, everything balanced. A closed system, where you eliminate as many variables as possible. It's sort of like playing a trick o nthe universe, to make it give you what you wanted and - 

"You all comfortable in there Maya?" Doctor Akagi said, strolling into the room wearing a wetsuit. A very, very snug looking wetsuit. It seemed to be giving her a wedgie. A very.... Snug... wedgie... Which Maya quickly looked away from. Oh gosh! She shouldn't stare, especially when she was meant to be working!

"Sh-Should I do anything in particular, Doctor?" Maya asked, cute as a button and retaining that air of professionalism by a horse's hair.

"We need you to focus on something that can take your full attention," wiggle wiggle. "Find something in the room that can keep your full attention, then shut off the parts of your brain that aren't focusing on it." Wiggle wiggle wiggle.

"Oh gee that computer over there sure seems interesting," Maya said, and - Oh no, Doctor Akagi had now moved in front of the computer! What were the odds of that?! Why, if Maya didn't know any better, she'd swear that Senpai was trying to show off her cute butt!

<hr>

"So we can't screw each other over..." Asuka grumbled to herself, while trying to distract the other two by bending over in front of the board, displaying her cute butt to both of them at once while making it pop up and down, twerking without trying to look like she was deliberately twerking. "Which is kinda half of the fun here. At best we can distract ourselves with sexy fun times, unless -"

"Pilot Ikari. I shall give you a lapdance in exchange for Shinjuku Station."

Now, Shinji would probably be a smart boy to take that deal. Rei, sitting in his lap, grinding her ass into him? That would feel like heaven, surely. He looked her dead in the eye, contemplated carefully, and then - 

"No deal!" he said. "You'd get off on that as well, so I want something else out of it!"

"Technically, we'll all get the winner's high simultaneously," Asuka quipped. "It's like we're being robbed of incentive to win - Verdammt, we've simulated Communism."

<hr>

Maya had to say, these tests were going in very strange directions. She hadn't been expecting Misato to join her in the same pod, for example. Also wearing a skintight plugsuit. Now. One might think that a young, gay woman like Maya would take one look at a body like Misato's getting in nice and snug with her, and start suffering nosebleeds. Well, you'd be wrong. Because you see, Maya had a type, and Misato didn't fit it.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to be attracted to women and not be into Misato Katsuragi, by the way? That's threading the needle, right there. The woman had the sort of body that one comes away with if some bored God goes 'hey what do I do with this clay? Actually you know what I'm kinda horny, let's see where that takes me'.

Yet Maya was in a situation that many would envy, and felt absolutely nothing from it except, you know, being generally awkward here as she was also trying to not stare at Ritsuko's body as she was, for reasons unknown to her, beginning to do lunges right in front of her pod. While Misato Katsuragi was close enough to give her a lapdance.

"Mind your hand," Maya politely said to Misato, her senior officer. Workplace harassment is no laughing matter after all! "Um! Are you getting lots of useful data from these experiments, senpai?"

"Oh, loads!" Doctor Akagi said while spontaneously leaning over in a way that made Maya kinda want to lean over as well. "Honestly, it's amazing you both fit in there, those were made for one person only. The readings we're getting are pretty interesting as well."

"How does it compare to our separate readings?" Maya asked. Knowing full well it would be above her paygrade, and that she only had a little knowledge of what the numbers really meant.

"Hrm? Oh! Well, it seems as though you're extremely focused, and Misato gets distracted easily," Ritsuko said. "Especially when I show off how limber I can be, like thi~is! She's obviously jealous of my workout session."

Steam probably shot out of Maya's nose. As they were currently in LCL, that meant some of the breathable liquid had a few more bubbles in it than normal. Maya turned to smile politely at Misato, and - Yep, still felt absolutely nothing here. Now. time to resume <i>not</i> staring at Misato, okay? Okay!

<hr>

"Hey, quit trying to pretend you're not checking us out for a second, knucklehead!" Asuka knocked her knuckles against Shinji's head, then rubbed her own a moment later. Can't even do that much, urgh! "We know what you're thinking."

"And we don't mind, we get hot from it too," Rei said. "I have an answer. What if I -"

"Gave me a bigger dick using our powers?" Shinji finished. "Uh... Yeah, actually, that sounds like a good deal. So, lapdance and bigger dick in exchange for Shinjuku Station?"

The two of them shook hands, but Asuka wasn't too impressed. Typical guy. Thinking about the size of his junk. Listen, guys. It doesn't need to be that big to satisfy a woman. Honestly, ask them about this. If it's too big it hurts. Okay? Sorry to break the porn illusion, but -

"Oops it went insi~ide," Shinji sang, while Rei sang a different melody. Asuka squeezed her thighs together and shot the pair of them a Look. "Hey, Asuka! Tell you what, if you give me Harajuku I'll let you be the first to suck my new -"

"Deal," Asuka said, tossing the card at him and kinda hating herself for making the deal so easily. Ah, the way of the tsundere is as mysterious as it is adorable.

<hr>

Yeah, so, Maya was kinda not hanging around the lab anymore because things were starting to get kinda... weird. It was hard to explain exactly when. Maybe the point when Doctor Akagi tried climbing inside the pod with her. Maybe when she caught Misato staring at Doctor Akagi's boobs. Or maybe it was when she was starting to hear things in her head that she hadn't heard before. It wasn't that she was being tsundere or playing hard to get, she just wanted to get out of there.

Either way, no deal, she wasn't sticking around any longer thanks. While she was kinda oblivious, she wasn't <i>that</i> oblivious. Could it be...? No way, it wasn't possible, but could Misato and Doctor Akagi be an item? A workplace romance between two old friends, and - 

"Hey, how did those tests go?" Hyuga asked, strolling alongside Aoba through the hallway. Maya approached them, opened her mouth - 

And suddenly found herself staring at her own body from across the hall. Staring back at herself in adorable confusion.

As one, all three of the bridge bunnies said the same thing: "Uh oh!"