Sunday, 16 April 2017

Story: Urusei Yatsura Secret Santa


Goodness, this girl really did have stars in her eyes, didn't she? Ran smiled politely at her. This girl was really cute! You know. Once you got her out of her suit of armour, the helmet of which Ran couldn't even lift. 'I would have have better luck pulling the sword from the stone and becoming King of all England than lifting that from the carpet!' Ran thought to herself. And this Asuka girl had been wearing that helmet until a moment ago. Moved around like she was wearing a leotard.

And here she was thinking the stories were exaggerations. This earth girl made Shinobu's temper tantrums look like a sneezing fit in comparison! Normally this is where Ran would get extremely nervous about what she was planning to do. She'd stop right there. Genuinely help Asuka back home as soon as possible to get her out of the ship and far, far away from her without in any way upsetting her in the least bit.

<i>Except</i> that Ran felt like she was being scared of a cute little bunny rabbit. Obviously considering her earlier thoughts this alien girl had some understanding of the Arthurian mythos, but had never quite managed to get around to the Flying Circus telling of those tales.

"What a quaint home you have," Asuka said, much more relaxed all of a sudden. "It's so cozy and pleasant in here. I really have this strong sense that I am completely safe from men within this room."

There were at least three, perhaps four things that Ran could have taken as an insult in that statement. She might normally have thrown out a little bit of an understated biting remark of her own automatically on hearing that kind of thing, but as she was currently a stereotype of femininity she simply smiled back at her guest and said a genuinely polite "Thank you."

After all, a truly genuine thanks was the least she could do for the girl considering she was about to become a guinea pig...

<hr>
As for Asuka Mizunokouji : Who is she? Why is she the way she is? The answer to that is simple enough :She's Shutaro Mendo's bride to be, according to an arrangement between their two extremely wealthy families. The trouble is, the Mizunokouji family kept poor Asuka isolated for her entire life, leaving her with no real concept of relationships until her very first encounter with a man. Who happened to be named Ataru Moroboshi.

Yes dear reader, can it be any wonder that she has a crippling fear of men based on that first impression? It's a wonder the girl has any semblance of sanity at all. Couple that mortal terror with enough strength to uproot and carry trees, the speed of a car and the agility of a wildcat, you can see that Ran had let quite the beautiful beast inside her home.

Still, something about Ran was making her feel very calm. Asuka didn't have many friends. Even at the exclusive all-girls school she attended, the other girls had something a little bit off about them that made Asuka feel uncomfortable. In contrast, Ran was projecting an aura of total femininity. For one with a fear of men, it was like dumping a big pile of catnip on a cat that had never tried it before. She wanted to bask in the scent, relax her entire body and soak in it.

"Now, Asuka. Doesn't that armour get all hot and sweaty?" Ran asked, giving Asuka a sweet and friendly smile that made her feel completely at ease. "I mean, running around with something like that under the sun must be an awful experience."

"It does get a little warm sometimes," Asuka admitted. "However, I would rather be a little warm than be stared at by those... Awful... lecherous eyes. I've heard that if a man stares at you for too long, it turns a woman 'loose'." She stretched out her arms. "I feel like if my arms were any more loose, they might fall off! I don't know how other girls manage it."

"Oh, that's easy!" Ran replied. "It's all about the attitude. Here, try this."

Gosh what a pretty looking blue flower! Asuka smiled and leaned into it to take a better look. "What's it called?" she asked, taking a sniff. "I've never seen a breed like..." she blinked and took another deep breath. The smell of the ocean invaded her nostrils, and she could swear that she felt it settling in on her brain. Like a big lead weight sitting in the back of her mind. Her posture slouched, her breathing slowed until every breath out sounded like a heavy weary sigh.

"I want to be like those other girls," Asuka sighed, taking little note of the sudden blueness of her eyes, skin and hair. Or the blueness of her attitude. "The other girls don't seem so frightened of men. Don't they know how scary they can be? I've heard that they all think with their cocks, but surely roosters aren't that intelligent! What are they seeing that I'm not? Oh, woe is me!"

"Here, maybe this will make you feel better?" Ran suggested, this time putting a green flower out in front of her. Green? That was a little unusual for a flower's colour, it wouldn't stand out among grass and leaves at all! Just like poor little Asuka wouldn't stand out because all she wanted to do was hide. She could feel sympathy for this flower. She sniffed it -it smelled like a summer's morning out in the garden - and her mood returned to normal.

"Y-yes," Asuka sniffed. "I think that did help a little. How strange. I was suddenly overcome by this ever growing sense of ennui and awareness of my own personal failings."

"In other words, you felt really bad about the fact that you were so scared of boys and desperately wanted to fix that problem?" Ran suggested. Asuka nodded. "Yes, that's the impression I had as well, tee hee! How interesting! Here, what do you think of these two?"

This time Ran pushed two flowers at once into Asuka's face. Red and pink. They both smelled divine. Red was carried by a peculiar spicy aroma, while the pink was as sweet as a mountain of sugar. Strangely, these contrasting tastes complimented each other so much that when Ran tried to pull them away she reflexively grasped hold of her wrist to keep them in place.

"Ah, Asuka?" Ran said. "Please let go of my wrist. You're starting to hurt it and... Oh my goodness, I didn't expect stripes!"

Asuka's eyes fluttered closed as she took it in. Yes, of course. It all made sense now! Teehee! She felt so cutesy, yet also full of burning passion. It was like her brain had melted into cotton candy while she was sitting there breathing it in, but at the same time her willpower had been forged into iron steel.

Suddenly she let go of Ran's wrist and stood up, accidentally flinging her backwards across the room and clear over her seat. With her hands on her hips and her eyes even more starry than usual through a pink and red striped view, Asuka was standing with more cutesy confidence than she'd ever stood before!

"I will overcome my fear of boys!" she insisted with a mighty harumph, then immediately cupped her hands underneath her chin and blushed. "Oooh! That was soooo confidence sounding, wasn't it? I'm such a silly billy, but I'm also a silly billy who will get results! Onwards! Tee hee! Thank you Ran, you were a super help! Ta-ta, bye bye!"

"Don't mention it!" Ran chirped from where she'd fallen over. Asuka half skipped and half marched from the spaceship, and when she was gone Ran groggily sat up with a great big smile on her bright yellow face. "Oh dear, I appear to have taken in a big lungful of yellow flowers," she said, and then politely laughed into her hand. "Ah! And I crushed the green flowers so there's no way to turn myself back to normal! Oh well! I'll be happy just the way I am!"


<hr>
Ever think to yourself "I'm about to do something I'm going to regret?" Well, Ryunosuke was currently doing something she was deeply regretting, and at the same time was pretty sure she'd wind up doing something she would regret to whoever was responsible for this situation.

"Aw, such a shame I can't control your facial features," the version of her wearing a bunny girl suit said. "Otherwise I'd turn that frown upside down!"

Ryunosuke scowled at her. This traitorous doppleganger! She squirmed and tried to get back to her feet or at least away from her current seat. But to no avail. She was stuck sitting in the lap of Ataru Moroboshi. Of all people! Ugh, just the thought made her feel weird in her stomach.

"What's even the point of this?" she demanded. "Holding our dolls in this disgusting pose!"

"I don't think it's disgusting," Ataru said, sliding his hand down her thigh. She tried to slap it away, but for some reason she shuddered at the touch and let it continue. "And I think you like it too."

"Nobody cares what you have to think!" she yelled at him. Guh! What was with this weird feeling! Every time she looked at him her heart started beating a little faster and faster. Instead she forced her attention onto the dolls being held in the other her's hands. Ryunosuke's own doll with her legs wrapped around the waist of the Ataru doll. The other her smirking this wicked smirk.

"Aw, don't look at me like that," the bunnygirl said, pouting at them. "I'm just having a bit of harmless fun, and don't want the two of you getting in the way." Before Ryunosuke could ask what the hell she meant by that, the bunnygirl pulled out a strip of cloth and wrapped it around the two dolls, tying them snugly together. With that done she put them on the desk, then spun sharply on her heels and bent over at the waist to pick up some more dolls, deliberately giving both of them a faceful of barely covered ass and then giving it an equally deliberate wiggle.

"Encore!" Ataru called. Ryunosuke tried to slap him, but her arms were tightly bound up behind his back. All she could do was use her hand to rub and caress it, which wasn't helping her funny feeling at all. "Encore!"

"Thank you, thank you!" the bunnygirl bowed, this time showing off her tits. "For my next trick, I'm going to use these magical dolls and suggestions from the audience to transform a bunch of local prudes into total perverts!"

She stuck the dolls in her cleavage and posed seductively, putting her hands behind her head thrusting out her chest and jutting a hip to one side. "Pick a prude," she licked her lips. "Any prude!"


  1. Earlier, Ataru made Benten and Oyuki attend a lapdancing lesson. Now they're starting to wonder why.
  2. Playtime starts with worry-free Sakura!
  3. Or the sleeping and dreaming Lum!
  4. Shinobu starts trying to seduce Prince Ataru.
  5. Ataru tells bunny girl Ryonosuke about the address book in exchange for helping her play.
  6. Something else

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