Story: Alternate Runner

 

Behold a familiar sight. Ranma Saotome and Akane Tendo on their way to school. Her, in her blue school uniform, clutching her back with both hands, holding it out in front of herself while strolling on the pavement. Him, up on the fence in a truly impressive feat of balance control, hands behind his head.

Neither of them had said a word to each other all morning. All the same, Ranma broke the silence first.

“So,” he said casually, eyes half-lidded as he stared up at the sky, “guess congratulations are in order, huh?”

Akane’s shoulders stiffened. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Ranma smirked and adjusted his footing on the fence. “C’mon, Akane, the whole school’s already buzzing with gossip’. Didn’t know you were into flashy weddings. Think Lum’ll insist on the horns stayin’ on for the ceremony?”

Akane stopped dead. She turned slowly, her glare sharp enough to cut glass. “I. Am. Not. Engaged. To. Her!”

Ranma hopped down from the fence and landed beside her, hands still tucked behind his head. “Uh-huh. That’s what I said about Shampoo. And Ukyo. And—”

“THIS IS NOT THE SAME THING!” Akane snapped, face flushing. “I didn’t agree to anything! She just—she grabbed me and started shouting and everyone assumed—!”

Ranma tilted his head, studying her with a grin that was just a little too knowing. “Wow. Sounds rough. Almost like gettin’ declared someone’s fiancé because you beat ’em in a fight.”

Akane opened her mouth, then closed it again. Her hands clenched at her sides. “…That’s different.”

"Is it now~" Ranma teased, jumping down onto the street in front of her, giving her a great big smug look. "Blegh, you wouldn't mind telling me how it's different, would you?"

Akane, for her part, blushed like mad. The whole thing was not what she was used to. The worldly attention, having everyone putting their trust and faith in her. She'd come up with a clever solution in using do-chan, but - But even so! Having Ranma tease her like this, having to deal with an alien Princess that was actually, you know, kinda hot trying to flirt with her all the time as well on top of that -

"Ranma, you idiot!" she yelled, and clobbered him good and hard, sending the rude boy flying. All that she really wanted was a bit of sympathy here!

She trudged on towards school grumbling darkly to herself about how rotten this whole situation was. What a mess, from top to bottom! How could it possibly get worse?

“Alas! Woe and thrice woe!” croaked a gravelly voice.

Cherry emerged from behind a telephone pole that Akane was certain had been empty a second ago, hopping forward on his staff. He squinted up at her, one rheumy eye twitching, then gasped dramatically.

“Ooooooh! Such turbulence upon thy brow! Such storms of destiny! Young lady, thy love life is a burning house built atop a cursed foundation!”

Akane recoiled. “I didn’t ask!”

Cherry peered closer, nose wrinkling. “Hmm… a tangled fate indeed. A rival from the stars… a bond forged in battle… vows unspoken yet loudly proclaimed…”

Akane’s face went pale. “…You can tell all that just by looking at me?”

“Indeed!” Cherry declared proudly. “The face never lies! Especially when destiny has stomped upon it with iron sandals.”

Akane groaned and clutched her head. “Great. Even you know about it.”

Cherry nodded solemnly. “Child, I sense confusion. Denial. Suppressed rage. And a powerful aura of ‘this is not what I signed up for.’ Truly, your heart weeps—”

“I AM NOT IN LOVE WITH HER!” Akane shouted.

Cherry blinked. “…Ah. A classic case of protesting too much.”

“That’s not—! I mean—!” Akane sputtered, then deflated. “I just want things to go back to normal…”

“Normal?” Cherry chuckled darkly. “There is no normal once destiny has selected thee as its chew toy.”

Before Akane could respond—or kick him—another voice cut crisply through the air.

“Uncle.”

Just that one word—and he stiffened like he’d been struck. A tall woman approached from the direction of the school gates, arms folded beneath a white lab coat. Her long black hair framed a composed, almost bored expression. She stopped beside Cherry and looked down at him coolly. “I told you not to harass students before school.”

“I was merely offering spiritual guidance!” Cherry protested.

Sakura exhaled a long suffering weary sigh. “You were bothering her.”

Cherry scowled, then glanced at Akane again. “Remember my words, child! The oni’s affection is not so easily escaped!”

And with that, he hobbled off, muttering darkly to himself.

Akane watched him go, then turned to the woman who’d dismissed him so effortlessly. “Uh… thanks.”

Sakura regarded her in silence for a moment, sharp eyes taking in Akane’s posture, the tension in her shoulders, the frustration she was barely holding together.

“…You’re the human Lum’s attached herself to,” Sakura said finally.

Akane nearly jumped. “W-what?! How do you—?!”

“I have my ways.” Sakura stared down at her. “And my reasons.” She straightened slightly. “I’m Sakura. I’ll be serving as Furinkan High’s nurse starting today. It's nice to meet you, Akane Tendo."

======

Ranma was still grinding teeth in the street, massaging his shoulder where Akane had very enthusiastically thumped him, when a sleek shadow fell across him. He looked up just in time to see a very formally dressed young man land from the sky—parachute folding neatly behind him, aura of spending thirty grand just on attitude intact. The boy dusted his trousers carefully, then looked down at Ranma with a poised, mild frown.

“Excuse me,” he said crisply, voice smooth and refined, “but do you happen to know where Tendo Akane is?”

Ranma blinked. Huh. This guy had been so formal in his tone, language, and demeanour that he asked for Akane's name in the Japanese order, rather than the Western one, despite this story being written in English. Also, it was rarely a good sign when someone was asking for the name of someone he knew.

“…What? Why’d you want to know?”

The newcomer’s expression didn’t flicker—too used to people asking him questions. He tilted his head, jet-black hair perfectly in place.

“I’m transferring to Furinkan High,” he began with immaculate confidence, “To be closer to both Tendo Akane and Lum Invader. Quite pretty, both of them—far more so than the average young lady. I intend to give them proper attention.”

Ranma blinked again. Well. That was … bold of him. And weirdly arrogant. “Uh,” Ranma said, hands on hips, unimpressed. “Yeah, good luck with that. Who are you?”

The boy inclined his head with aristocratic precision. “Shutaro Mendo—son of the Mendō Zaibatsu, inheritor of the family, and destined gentleman of impeccable breeding.”

Ranma snorted. “…That right? You got that on a business card?”

Mendo did not so much as blink. “I could issue one,” he said calmly, reaching into his jacket like Ranma was going to be impressed. “But that seems unnecessary. I’ll just ask again—have you seen Tendo Akane?”

Ranma stared a hole through this guy. Oh boy, he was gonna be trouble, wasn't he? Why did he have a really bad feeling about this? Beyond the obvious. It felt like his life was about to get a whole lot more complicated - and in all honesty, he didn't much care for how it felt.