Story: Creeping Perversion

 

Imagine holding a lifelong grudge over your twin sister being beat up by someone you'd tormented, because they thought that your sister was you. Try to imagine being that self unaware. The sad part is, for this cast of characters that's not even top ten lack of self awareness.

The names of these twins were Pink and Link. A pair of Chinese girls who, remarkably, did not have obvious naming ties to cleaning products or spices. And they had it out for Shampoo something fierce. Whose fault was it, exactly? Was it Pink's for being a poison maniac, testing out her poisons on the young stranger without her consent? Was it Shampoo's for having the violent reaction after being cured by Link?

Link is the only one that could be called truly blameless, then. In any event, Pink wasn't the sort to let a grudge go quietly. So they'd tried for revenge. Got beat up over it. Then tried to get revenge for their last attempt to get revenge. Get beat up again. Ad nauseum.

Which brings us to the present, and to Nerima, and to one very unfortunate martial artist with a terrible sense of direction.

Ryōga Hibiki was lost again. Of course he was. That wasn’t the remarkable part. The remarkable part was that for once, he had actually found people before starving to death or accidentally wandering into another prefecture.

Two girls. Standing in the middle of the street. One red, one blue. Identical faces, different expressions. One delighted by something only she could see, the other halfway to an apology for whatever her sister was about to do.

He licked his lips in anticipation. Ooh, they were cute! No, wait, no! Don't think that, don't think about that - You're falling back into the same lustful pattern! They didn’t move when he approached. They just watched him, like cats deciding whether a mouse was worth the effort. Just get past them. Just get past them. Find somewhere without all these cute girls tempting him, so he could meditate and control himself and not go on a sexual rampage!

"Excuse me," the blue one said, bowing slightly. "Would you be so kind as to step aside, if you please?"

The red one’s grin widened. "Because the path ahead is... special, if you please!."

He stopped. He didn’t like the sound of that. Ryoga continued staring at the ground, so he could control himself better. Control himself, control himself, don't do anything weird to these girls!

"I’m not in your way," Ryōga muttered. "Just trying to get through."

The red one leaned forward, plant pot in hand. "Oh, you’ll get through something, all right, if you please."

He blinked and looked up. "What?" A soft puff of green powder hit him full in the face before the one word question even finished leaving his mouth. The smell was floral and sweet, which would’ve been nice if his vision hadn’t immediately started spinning. He coughed. "What the hell-?"

"Relaxation powder," the red one said cheerfully. "A mild sedative. Helps you sleep after battle. Or during one, if you please."

"Pink!" The other girl - Link, as he would soon learn - grabbed her arm. "You can’t just - he’s not Shampoo!"

"So what, Link?" Pink replied. "Did you not see his lustful gaze? He was about to do something really nasty to us, if you please!"

It was that bad...? Ryoga grunted, and tried to stand up - but to no avail. He couldn't move a muscle. This stuff was pretty potent! It was probably for the best. Oh, but Link was leaning over him, pulling out some sort of medicine.

"Sorry about this, if you please!" Link said. "My sister can get overly protective sometimes."

Without knowing what he was doing, Ryoga whispered in the twin's ear. He didn't know what he whispered, exactly, but... It felt right. It felt like the right thing to say to her. She seemed surprised by it.

"Hey, what are you saying to my sister?!" Pink interrupted. "Say it to me as well!"

And so, he did, without a second thought. Link, meanwhile, finished treating him, while Pink pulled out some weird looking plant. Aimed it at him as if it was a firearm. Nasty looking thing, sort of like a cross between a cactus and a venus flytrap.

"Don't try anything!" Pink said. The flytrap portion snapped its jaws open and closed. Funny thing, but in the real world flytraps cannot do that easily. If you activate one and it doesn't have anything in it to digest, or if it's trapped something too big to properly crush and digest, then the plant will die instead. Here, though, it was able to do that. Just sharing some fun trivia, it doesn't actually affect the story all that much. Anyway, it snapped open and shut again, and the thorns around it seemed to almost vibrate, as if getting ready to shoot out. "We are not looking for a husband, if you please! We want revenge!"

"Against Shampoo, right?" Ryoga asked. "Ah... You probably want to beat up Ranma Saotome, if I'm not mistaken?"

"We tried that, if you please," Link said, sounding almost apologetic. "But that wasn't as easy as we thought it would be!"

"We spread a nasty rumour about him being a weakling," Pink pouted. "But then, that sneaky old woman sent back images of Ranma fighting dirty old man Happosai, looking all cool, and - "

Pink stopped to fan herself down. She fidgeted and took a deep breath before continuing.

"Anyway!" she huffed. "The point is, we need to get revenge on her some other way!"

"I mean, I think at this point we'll just get beat up again," Link said, giving a weary sigh. "She's a little too wise to our tricks now, and so is her future husband..."

Hrmph. Future husband. It was funny, once upon a time Ryoga had assumed he'd be able to get rid of Ranma by making him marry Shampoo. Or Ukyo. Now, he wasn't so sure he deserved Akane anymore. He was becoming a total pervert. Even now, he couldn't stop imagining himself in a hot and heavy threesome with these twins. His balls were aching, whispering to him to head back to Kasumi, go find Ranma's girl form, go find any of the total babes he knew were lurking in Furinkan - and got completely wild, like an animal.

"You might have more luck seducing Saotome than beating him up," Ryoga said. "Despite how he behaves, he has a strange weakness for women. If you'll excuse me, I have somewhere else to be."

With that, he left, intending to get as far away from the Tendo home as he could. Naturally, he was back in Kasumi's bedroom, balls deep in her anal cavity within an hour.

But that's not where our focus is going to lie, at least, for now.

=====

Pink watched the perverted stranger with the nice butt vanish down the street and a grin crept on her face. Oho! What a fun idea he'd given her!

"Seduce Ranma Saotome…" she murmured. "Now that’s an idea."

Link looked to her like she'd just grabbed a random chicken and bitten its head off without warning. "Please tell me you’re joking."

"Why would I be?" Pink turned to her sister, eyes glinting. "If Shampoo likes him, and we take him, wouldn’t that be the ultimate revenge? Better than poison, better than any of our old tricks." She clasped her hands together with exaggerated drama. "Her little heart would shatter like glass!"

"Pink," Link said slowly, "that’s cruel."

Pink looked genuinely offended. "You say that like it’s a bad thing.*"

"It is a bad thing!" Link’s voice wavered somewhere between exasperation and pleading. "Hurting someone’s feelings isn’t the same as defeating them. Besides, you can’t honestly think either of us could seduce someone away from Shampoo?" She pulled a chart down from... somewhere, which showed an image of Shampoo. "As you can plainly see, if you please, Shampoo is a fine piece of ass. Seducing someone away from her would not be a simple task!"

"Why not give it a try anyway?" Pink interrupted, twirling a loose strand of hair around one finger. "You could play the sweet one, the gentle one. I’ll be the mysterious, dangerous one. Between us, we’d have him hopelessly confused in a week."

"That’s… not exactly a healthy goal."

Pink smirked. "Oh, come now, sister dear. Admit it! The idea’s got a certain poetry to it. After all, we’ve been chasing Shampoo for years. Maybe it’s time we chased something else."

Link sighed, rubbing her forehead. "We don’t need boyfriends, Pink. We need jobs. Less time spent getting punched by the Joketsuzoku. More time settling down and figuring out a direction with our lives!"

"Jobs are boring. Revenge is exciting."

"Revenge gets us hospitalized."

Pink waved this away as if it were a trifling detail. "You’re just saying that because you’re afraid to have fun. When was the last time you even thought about romance? Don’t think I haven’t noticed how quiet you’ve been every time Mousse’s name comes up."

Link stiffened as a long buried memory clawed up to the surface. It's true. She used to have a crush on that half blind idiot. "That was years ago. I tested him, turns out he spooked a bit too easily!" Pink said primly. 

Link stared at her sister in open disbelief. This was the first she'd heard of this! "You dosed him with something?"

"Only a little." Pink’s grin was unrepentant. "It was meant to slow his pulse, not stop his interest, if you please."

"You can’t keep people by experimenting on them, if you please!"

"That’s what you say, but it worked for some marriages in history."

"Pink! This is why I don't have any friends, if you please!"

"What? I’m just saying! Men like a challenge. It's not my fault he couldn't rise to the occasion."

Link folded her arms. "I don’t think poisoning counts as ‘a challenge.’"

Pink looked thoughtful for a moment, which was always a dangerous mood for her to be in. "Alright," she said finally. "No poisons. Not for the first date, at least."

Link groaned softly into her hands. But Pink was already in her own world, eyes bright with the thrill of a new scheme. "Imagine it, Link. Shampoo’s precious Ranma falling head over heels for me, or for you! She’d never recover. And it would serve her right, wouldn’t it?"

"I suppose," Link said, tired now. She was always the one to wear down first when they disagreed on what to do next. "If one defines ‘right’ as ‘petty and catastrophic.’"

Pink laughed, delighted. "Exactly!"

They walked on, side by side, the red and blue of their dresses flashing against the late-day sun. One plotting, one regretting, both too tangled in each other’s logic to ever really stop. Neither one noticed that their long repressed libido was roaring up to the surface, guiding their thoughts, manipulating their actions in ways that neither one of them could articulate. It was true though, the pair of them had been ignoring love for such a long time - but now? Now they were all set to drown in it.