Story: Konatsu's New Technique

Have you heard the old saying “you can’t con a con man”? The reason for that is simple enough to grasp. Those in the art of the confidence game are attuned to the typical lures and misdirections used to deceive and guide others into the kinds of action they intend. They can see the little cues. Hear the little inflections in the tone of voice. They know what to look for and where to look for it, because they’ll have practised it more times than they can count… But there’s a little more to it than that.

Because what it comes down to is that you can’t be all that effective at tricking people if you don’t, at some level, understand them. You could almost view it as two predators approaching each other.

Nabiki Tendo, the ice queen of Furinkan. A girl that set up gambles with the students regarding sporting events or fights, then set about fixing the results towards her own profit. A girl that indulged in sarcasm and delighted in tormenting others at every turn for no other reasons than petty amusement and padding out her wallet. A girl that, in spite of the above, would still be voted the third most desired girl in school were anyone to conduct a scientific poll of the Furinkan students, or merely to keep track of how many confession letters her locker accumulated.

Of course, it probably wounded her pride slightly that one of the girls above her was her own little sister, while the other was the girl form of her cursed future brother-in-law. Then again, when the competition is high enough some people are content with third place… Especially since she could easily make money from their pictures. That’s just the kind of girl that she was.

The other was Shampoo. The strongest fighter from her generation in a village that has a literal translation meaning “village of warrior women”. Pretty impressive, and it probably would make someone think she was some sort of hulking brute made of muscles and scar tissue, but I defy anyone to examine her body, find any trace of a scar, and walk away remembering why they were doing that in the first place. Or, for that matter, their name. If Nabiki was the “cold” kind of hot that made you interested because she didn’t seem to be, Shampoo was the kind of hot usually found in an inferno. Bubbly, exotic, had a figure and face that hit the “sexy” switch on every society with one. It was honestly harder to tell which was her best quality: Her astounding fighting ability, or her radiant sex appeal.

What was much less obvious was her devious mind. She put up a front of being blatant, brutal and to the point but actually Shampoo had a rather disquieting tendency towards outright manipulation of a person into doing what she wanted. She knew that not every hammer was a nail. Some were screws. Others were bolts. Each issue needed its own way of dealing with it, and she was well equipped for virtually any task the world could throw at her. Well equipped… In more ways than one.

So you could almost say that these two girls were cut from different clothes, but made into the same shape. That’s why, at a glance, they could both tell that the other wanted something pretty much right away. While most people might have used that revelation simply to exchange favours, this was not how the kind of people either of them were. Instead, they both immediately set about working out ways to turn the situation to their own advantage, because there isn’t a predator on the planet for whom enough is simply enough.

“Mercenary girl,” Shampoo said, carefully watching her arch-rival’s evil elder sister. In many ways, this was the ideal test for trying out her Master’s enslaving technique. Not only was she the sort of girl that would never willingly take orders from someone with as little money as Master, but she was also pretty, smart, ruthless, manipulative… Which would help Shampoo acquire further test subjects and simultaneously prevent her from figuring out what was going on and attempt to blackmail her.

It would also be intensely satisfying watching the manipulative little witch using her smart mouth to suck Master’s (almost certainly) giant, satisfying dick. Not that Shampoo had any intentions of watching any such thing, but the idea of it was certainly inviting.

“Warrior girl,” Nabiki cooly replied, inspecting her fingernails in a far too obvious disinterested manner. Instantly, Shampoo realised that Nabiki was aware that she wanted something. Why else would she bother talking with Nabiki? It was the only time they ever communicated, when one wanted something from the other. “Nice weather we’re having, wouldn’t you say?”

In other words, I know that you know I know you want something, but want you to bring it up because forcing you to do so gives me the power over the conversation. Now, Shampoo could easily hogtie the girl in seconds flat, drag her off to Konatsu and sweet talk him into trying the technique out on her. But Shampoo was pretty sure that would be the difficult way to do things in the long run.

“Shampoo want date with airen,” she lied. Well, not exactly a lie. Of course she wanted to date Ranma, but that wasn’t why she was talking with the greedy girl right now. “You help Shampoo. Make it worth your while!”

“Is that all?” Nabiki asked with a quirked eyebrow. Shampoo was all smiles. Not exactly innocent, because that would make her seem even more suspicious, but rather a more calculating smirk that Nabiki might well be expecting. “And here I was thinking you might be interested in what’s been going on recently. You know how crazy things get around here.”

She left it like that with palm upturned, and Shampoo immediately reached into hammerspace to pull out her purse. Some things don’t change, and Nabiki’s ability to make anything sound like it was worth trading a little cash over, well, it was just a good thing for everyone she’d never worked out a way to turn it into a full-fledged martial art.

“What happen?” Shampoo insisted while Nabiki counted the cash. She knew she was being played, but that was just the way Nabiki rolled. She let you know she was playing a game with you, and won that game by getting you to play it with her.

“Well, if you insist…” Nabiki said. “Don’t run off until you’ve heard absolutely everything.” And now Shampoo <i>knew</i> something was up. Did she really want to tell Shampoo all of this right away? There was a slight trace of eagerness hidden in her tone, almost bordering on paranoia. What? From the Ice Queen? “Ranma paid Akane a visit in her room last night,” she began. Now, that was exactly the sort of thing that Nabiki lived for. Out-of-context details like that which would have sent Shampoo (or anyone interested in either of the two) rushing off after them in a moment to stir a little chaos. Nabiki gripped her arm as if to prevent her from rushing away, as if that could have even slowed Shampoo down. “I overheard their conversation. They were talking about something… Strange.”

“Strange how?” Shampoo asked. Nabiki seemed to regain her sense of cool, and left her palm upturned. Shampoo scowled at her. Ooh, the greedy bitch! Even when she so obviously wanted help with something, she was being -

Wait, hold on. Ranma and Akane were behaving strangely, and Nabiki was worried about it? Could it be? Could the two of them have fallen under the influence of that weird technique Master Konatsu had used on her? If that was the case, no wonder she was being so cagey. She didn’t want to tip her hand any more than Shampoo did!

“This better be worth it,” Shampoo said, dropping any pretense of being nice about this while dropping the money right into Nabiki’s palm. “What they talk about? They not planning elope or something get them both killed?”

“It looks like a certain local martial artist has discovered a technique that bewitches the mind,” Nabiki said. “Not entirely unlike your memory shiatsu hair care trick. From the way they were talking, it looks like they were both completely under her spell and planning on getting the rest of us as well. Starting with you.”

Starting with her? Well then, that did rather cast a rather different light on that incident, didn’t it? Was that a deliberate setup? And… Wait just another moment, something else wasn’t quite right about all of this. If they intended to start with her, why wasn’t Nabiki at all concerned about the possibility of her being dragged away? It wouldn’t exactly be a difficult thing for her to manage. She could knock a non-martial artist out in the blink of an eye, hop across the rooftops and have her be practically anywhere in Tokyo before they woke up or anyone even noticed they were missing. At least, in theory she could do that. In practise, never attempted it.

Nabiki had to know that she could do that. Easily drag her off to Konatsu where he could use his technique, and then… Unless that was the very reason she was doing this in the first place?

She switched around their positions for a moment and realised in retrospect Nabiki’s strategy. It was actually rather elegant. Shampoo had previously demonstrated ruthless behaviour in getting what she wanted, meaning that if it had even remotely been her intention to kidnap Nabiki and enslave her to Master Konatsu then she would have done it immediately. Especially upon a revelation that she knew about the technique already. She’d even deliberately dropped the wrong gender into the conversation to deliberately trip Shampoo up, even though there was nothing Nabiki would be able to do if she did notice anything wrong.

In short; She was scared of being Konatsu’s next victim, and wanted some peace of mind that Shampoo wasn’t going to have her be enslaved at a moment’s notice. What’s more, by mentioning that Shampoo was their next target it would naturally instill a desire from Shampoo to stamp out the threat by any means available.

“Who is she?” Shampoo said, cracking her knuckles. “Before Shampoo call Great-grandmother, must know who is bug to squish.”

If you could see battle auras, you could see Nabiki’s deflate all around her. She’d caught the fish. Soon it would be time to reel it in. Sure, it would be a little bit more difficult due to her suspiciousness, but since when did any kind of warrior woman back down from a challenge? Besides! It would be best to get her out of the way as soon as possible, prevent her from being a threat to future analysis of the technique, which obviously she would need to perform if she was to determine the best possible counters to it. Then once she did that she would undo the effect on everyone, including herself and Nabiki, and reveal Master Konatsu to be the giant pervert he really was all this time!

<hr>
Konatsu was normally quite an active sort of person, but on this particular day he was finding it extremely hard to get anything done at all besides sitting in bed. Largely because he was extremely hard, not to mention large.

He stared at it as if it were a snake sleeping in his lap. This monumental appendage didn’t seem like it really belonged to him, seemed out of place on his muscular yet deceptively thin body. So far as he remembered it hadn’t been quite that large last night when he went to sleep!

“Oh, dear!” he slapped his cheeks and wailed in distress. “How terrible! Is this a sign of some kind of sickness? It has never swollen up in this manner before! Whatever should I do with this?”

Mistress Ukyo had already gone to work. That was perhaps for the best. The very notion of trying to explain what was wrong seemed absolutely humiliating! Why, the only way he could possibly do so is if he showed it to her. Even if she did have any idea what might be the matter, the only way she would be able to examine the problem would be if she were to take her hands, her wonderful, skillful hands and touch him on his dirty, swollen monster of a penis. She would have to squeeze the swollen parts, feel along the shaft until she had some sort of comprehension of what was causing this swelling, and then she would -

His dick throbbed in a manner that bordered between discomfort and pleasure. What on earth was he supposed to do?! He couldn’t even leave the house like this! It would show under pretty much anything he tried to wear!

“Oh, what is a poor kunoichi to do in a situation like this?” he asked nobody in particular, pressing the back of his hand to his forehead in utter despair. “It would be beyond humiliating if this unnatural growth would be noticed by anyone at all, but the only way that I would be able to hide it is if I had a lifetime of practising being the opposite sex and happened to be the greatest kunoichi of my genera- Pardon one moment, I may not have thought this through all the way.”

Of course! It seemed somehow obvious in retrospect. All he had to do was carefully apply a little tape to stick it to his stomach, wear an extremely loose fitting robe and move extremely delicately towards that delightful doctor’s office! Should anyone know the answer it must surely be him, and he’d at least taken an oath of privacy. With a quick little nod and a spring in his step that had been utterly absent all morning, Konatsu immediately set about his plan to get rid of this raging erection by visiting the doctor.

And who knows? If it turned out he could help right away, he might even know something about that new technique Konatsu was still so terribly confused about. Though obviously a demonstration would prove absolutely necessary….

1. Konatsu arrives at Doctor Tofu’s and accidentally enslaves him.
2. Konatsu gets interrupted mid-route by Shampoo.
3. Meanwhile, Ranma and Akane are utterly oblivious to both developments.
4. Konatsu arrives at Doctor Tofu’s during a Kasumi-caused freakout. Hits her with the technique by accident.
5. Something else