Story: HHL Film Project

He was not Ranma Saotome. He was a bold and daring hero, entering the lair of an evil, sinister villain. Not Ranma Saotome, but rather some entirely different bold, handsome and daring hero. It was difficult getting into the right mindset for this even though he had put on performances before. Mostly tricking Ryoga, but that boy was as easy to deceive as a newborn monkey. Still. He repeated the mantra. He was not Ranma Saotome for the duration of this scene. He was someone else entirely, a hero named Hero, which seemed a bit redundant to him but - as Akane had put it, even the best actors have to work with shoddy writing here and there. From their point of view, the writing didn’t matter so much as the performance.

It was probably that kind of attitude which explained her cooking, but that was a digression of the sort Ranma Saotome would indulge in. Not Hero. Which was who he was. Hero, not Ranma.

“And… action!”

His eyes snapped open and Ranma stepped into the training hall from the outer corridor with purpose in his stride that he usually reserved for those times when his old man had stolen the last of the rice cakes, or Happosai had just tagged him with almost frozen water.

No. That was wrong; Hero stepped into the lair of a wicked, mysterious villain who had been tormenting the nearby village. He had braved many threats, dared many traps, overcome many obstacles and vanquished many foes. He was ready for battle, eagerly checking his surroundings for signs of this terrible enemy…

“Oh, brave sir!” whimpered a woman’s voice. Hero turned and beheld a stunning woman, cowering in the corner. Her attire was strange, but made no secret of her alluring figure. “At last, rescue!” she called, leaping to her feet and skipping across the room to hug him. <i>Not Akane, she’s not sexy at all. She’s an uncute tomboy, not a smoking hot maiden in distress. No, sir!</i>

But Hero deftly sidestepped this approach, seized hold of her arm and twisted it behind her back.

“A nice attempt,” he said as she showed a portion of her true colours, squirming in his grasp with strength that contradicted the image of a helpless innocent. Indeed, this strength should have been enough to allow her to escape were she genuinely a prisoner. “Adopting the form of a pretty, helpless maiden to make me lower my defenses.” She squirmed to free herself, so he pulled her closer, permitting her no escape. “You will answer for your crimes!”

“Ugh…” she whined. “L-Let go of me! You’re wrong, I’m not the - Ah! Alright, fine! You caught me! Let go of my arm before you break it!”

This much he did, pushing her against a nearby wall. “That was a little too easy,” he said. “Drop your disguise!”

“I’m not wearing a disguise,” the villain cutely sniffed. “This is what I really look like. Some bad guy, huh?” she stuck her hands on her hips, deliberately stepped away from him, then began shifting her weight between her left foot and right foot, in a sort of sarcastic, overly exaggerated girlish mannerism. “Oh, gosh!” she said. “Look at that big bad villain! She’s so cute, she should just be a dancer.” She snorted, rolled her eyes, and began to dance right there and then. “Oh, yes,” she said, running her hands across her exposed waistline, then one hand up her body while the other trailed down her leg. “A cute girl like me should just dance for your amusement, while you stare in rapt attention at my super sexy taut stomach, leaving you daydreaming about kissing my navel…

“Ugh!” she declared, stomping her foot. “Do you have any idea how hard it is to be taken seriously when you look this cute?”

Hero would not willingly admit it aloud, but the dance had certainly made <i>something</i> hard. He coughed into his hand. “A-Anyway,” he said, banishing the sight of her dancing to the deepest pits of his imagination. <i>Not Ranma, and that’s not Akane. Ranma would never find Akane so sexy. Hypnotic dancing of any sort can’t possibly work in reality, but in the context of the scene it does so I have to pretend that it does. Right!</i> “I’m taking you to meet the people you have wronged, but you gave in rather more easily than expected. Therefore, I’m going to check you for weapons.”

“Of course,” the villain sighed in frustration, leaning against the wall. “But really, do you see anywhere I could be hiding a weapon in an outfit like this? I mean, look at this tiny, frilly skirt.” She began to sway her hips, causing the skirt to swish from side to side in a manner that would naturally draw the eye of anyone towards it. “It barely covers anything at all!”

<i>Alright, I think she’s going for the pseudo-hypnosis thing. As if something like this would ever make any guy get distracted. She has nowhere near a nice enough figure for that… But I have to watch her skirt swish around like that, have to pretend it’s having an effect on me. Pretend like she’s the hottest thing I’ve ever seen…</i>

“If you wanted to be taken seriously,” Hero continued, his eyes roaming the surprisingly sensual figure of his mortal enemy. “Then perhaps you would not wear something quite so… revealing?”

“What, and hide these legs from the world?” the villain replied with a smirk, reaching back to smooth a hand down her thigh. “I’m evil, not a monster. You have to admit, they <i>are</i> works of art.”

<i>Pft. Yeah, right. Akane’s thighs are way too thick to be remotely appealing. Wait, no. That’s not Akane, that’s the seductive villain. Akane would never turn around, lean against the wall and slowly lift her knee like that…</i>

“Admit it,” the villain continued. “Say it aloud, what you’re thinking right now. There is no shame in admitting you find something visually appealing… Or are you that afraid of the female form?”

“Tsk.” Hero rolled his eyes. “Yes, your legs are rather more enticing than I might expect from one so twisted. But in the end beauty is only skin deep, and here stands the evidence!”

<i>Ugh, that was so damn pretentious. He could sort of see Akane barely holding back a laugh at that… Or was that the villain? She was trying to seduce the hero through her entrancing sex appeal, so laughing at him would completely ruin that objective. Maybe the villain found it amusing and was trying to hide it? He was just a little bit confused right now, so hard to keep track of what was what, best to pretend he didn’t notice.</i>

“Are you just going to stand there staring, or are you going to check me for weapons?”

Hero shook his head, and returned his attention to the task ahead of him. Huh? When had that villain turned around again? He could have sworn she was still teasing him for finding her sexy legs sexy. The situation was starting to get a little bit annoying, all truth told. He was quite grateful that his attire would ensure the throbbing erection he was enduring wasn’t remotely obvious. The villain’s blatant attempts to seduce him would absolutely be ignored from this point onwards.

Which is why he strode forward, determined to grab hold of her enticing, inviting, swaying ass. To check if she was hiding weapons under that skirt. For safety reasons.

He gripped her hips to keep her still, his right hand resting on her trim, fit waist while his left patted and squeezed the left side of her body, taking absolutely no delight in the way that she felt, the way she squirmed in his grasp, the way she made those cute little sounds… Then he had to switch grip, unconsciously pulling her closer to him. She smelled nice.

“Find anything?” the villain asked, pressing herself back into his body, forcing him to feel her wriggle up against him. The sudden motion almost threw him completely off balance, an effect made worse by the way she was pushed right up against his erection. Hero gasped in surprise. “No weapons?” the villain said. “Well… Unless you count my magnificent ass. Which you should, if you were smart, but right now you’re barely able to string together a coherent thought.”

“Wha-” Hero mumbled. <i>Huh, this acting thing is easier than I thought. Akane would never do something like that, and even if she did I would never react to her like this. No way would I be so turned on by Akane, but it makes sense for our characters!</i> “What did you do to me?”

“Did?” the villain chuckled, then somehow spun effortlessly out of his grip while he stood there feeling pleasantly numb. “Wrong tense, dear. Still doing.”

Before Hero could do anything at all, she grabbed him by the back of his head and used a surprising amount of strength to pull him into a full-mouthed kiss. <i>Not Akane, villain! Not Ranma, Hero! Nope. Not kissing Akane, not feeling her tongue in my mouth, not kissing her back. That’s only because Hero has been seduced by her hypnotic talents and nothing more!</i>

He roughly pushed her away and stumbled backwards, gasping for air. “What is this?” he demanded, but his thoughts were sluggish, his entire body was aching - burning with a need he barely understood. “What have you done to me?”

“Still the wrong tense,” the villain replied, licking her lips and alternating knee lifts, punctuating them with a slight bounce and kick. “It’s what I <i>am</i> doing to you, ever since you entered. My clothes, my body language, my words, they’re all carefully tailored to one effect.

“Tell me: Am I cute?” Hero nodded almost against his will while she continued doing that strangely alluring dance in place. “Am I sexy?” He nodded again. “Are my thighs too thick?” He shook his head. “Are my breasts too small?” He shook his head with such tremendous enthusiasm he feared it might fall off! “There you go. I’m a strong fighter, but why use the heat of the sun to make someone take off their coat when you can make them think it was their own idea?”

The villain’s eyes fixed with his, and even though Hero knew he should look away, he found it absolutely impossible. Her trap was absolute, with no avenue of escape. Even now, as she began to walk towards him, the most he could manage was to let his eyes wander over her body, now knowing that each move she made was specifically tailored to keep his attention, yet utterly powerless to prevent the strategy from working. She stepped forward with more of those knee lifts, promising to show him a glimpse of paradise but never quite delivering.

“You think I’m evil,” the beautiful, gorgeous, worshipful villain said. “But I’m conquering with kindness, and you absolutely cannot resist - Whoa!”

He moved to catch her instinctively. It was inevitable, really. The clumsy tomboy, doing alternating knee lift-kicks like that? Yeah, she was bound to stumble sooner or later, and of course it was when she started trying to wave her arms around like a jackass.

“You okay, little miss clumsy?” Ranma asked once Akane was back on her feet. She bit her lip and gave a sharp nod of her head. He gulped a little upon noticing his hand was resting on her thigh like that, and pulled it away as if it was hot enough to burn. He then nervously used that hand to tug on his pigtail, praying that she hadn’t noticed. “So… How was that? Better this time?”

“Better,” Akane replied. “What do you think? Do you think you’re… ready?”

“I guess?” Ranma frowned. “I mean… I don’t exactly remember it too great for some reason, but I feel like it played out like we sort of expected it to? Kind of felt more natural. Is that what acting feels like when you do it right?”

“That’s all on you,” Akane replied. She twirled in place cutely - well, if it were anyone else it might be cute - and began to skip out of the training hall. “We’ll practise more tomorrow!” she said. “We’ll have to put your new acting talent through its paces to make it right!”

Heh. Tomboy was underestimating him again. She’d see exactly how talented he was, just wait! He’d get the hang of this whole acting and performance thing in no time flat, then knock ’em all dead during the film!

But for now he was gonna have to sneak away to the bathroom to jerk off. For some weird reason he couldn’t quite put a handle on, he was stiffer than that last souffle Akane attempted.
<hr>
So, Akane skipped upstairs to her room, completely bypassing everyone else in the house, who ignored her strange choice of outfits because it honestly ranked quite low on the strangeness scale compared to recent events. All they would have thought was “Huh, Akane sure seems happy about something,” and gotten right back to what they were doing.

So it was that she skipped right on into her room, still clad as a cheerleader, still smiling until she flopped back onto her bed where she took a moment to stare at the ceiling before releasing a noise so high pitched that only cats could hear it.

“We kissed!” she exclaimed to herself. Her hands clasped underneath her jaw, and she began to roll around on her bed, back and forth like some sort of giant horizontal yoyo. “We kissed, we kissed! He kissed me back!”

This tremendous excitement appeared to die out of nowhere when she suddenly hopped right up onto her feet with a frown on her face, and began to rapidly pace back and forth around the room with her hands behind her back and her eyes tracking the floor ahead of her.

“But we’re not having sex,” she complained. “Ohhh, that boy! If I’d pushed any harder, it might have scared him off. What does he need, landing lights? If only I hadn’t tripped, he might have even tried something. Which of us is the bigger idiot, then?”

Ah, but it appeared that the darkness alighting her soul had but a brief existence before she was leaning against her wardrobe mirror, staring intently at her own reflection with a triumphant smirk.

“On the other hand, he definitely wanted me,” Akane noted, licking her lips. “He might even want me worse than I want him. In fact, I bet that’s what’s scaring him off; he doesn’t want to scare <i>me</i> off! Oooh, I could just eat him alive, that’s so adorable! I simply have to be patient, and then -”

She started to roll around on her bed again, caught up in the flights of fancy: The two of them together on the school roof, with him pinning her back against a wall and taking her every bit as roughly as she wanted it, before the scene mutated into the two of them right there, in her room, on her bed. The room lit only by candlelight as he lovingly placed kisses all along her inner thigh -

And she was up again on her feet pacing the room. “Patience sucks,” she declared. Then, quieter, “I want my man meat, and I want it now!”

Okay. Okay. She stopped to stare at herself in the mirror again. Breathe. Just breathe. You’re a knockout. He wants you. He likes you, he’s just in complete denial about it because he’s like you used to be. Proud. Prudish. No sense of fun. Just think about him for a moment. What would work on Ranma? How does one go about seducing Ranma Saotome?

A smile crept upon her pretty face as a few ideas began to materialize in her mind, guided by the perverted perspective that had been bestowed upon her. Oh, yes. She would have her man. She would leave him unable to resist her. She would push all of his buttons and flip all of his levers, and let out the wildman she knew lurked within.
<hr>
We’ve all heard the expression “kid in a candy store”, right? It’s a basic metaphor for someone completely surrounded by everything they want, and they have their pick of what to take. Well, let’s extend the metaphor a little bit. The kid has a limited amount of time on his/her hands, a limited amount of cash to spend it, and a limited appetite to gorge. Therefore they must choose wisely based on their limited resources.

So, with that in mind. Ataru Moroboshi had long since dreamt of having himself a harem. Until recently that had seemed like a futile dream; but now that he was walking out of Ucchan’s with Lum hanging off his arm after having a threesome with a sexy okonomiyaki chef that sorta reminded him of Ryu for some reason, and the two of them were having a pretty open discussion about other girls to add to the harem…

Yeah, reality has a funny way of setting in when you realise your dream is within reach. In the back of his mind Ataru was already aware of a few crucial facts: One, that Lum would’ve always been his first or second pick for a harem. Two, he would need to pick his other girls carefully.

That first one was something he didn’t particularly feel like dwelling on, beyond the fact that Lum was smoking hot and there were sparks between them. Often literally. In fact, he could sort of feel a bit of static tickling his arm right there and then.

As for the second? Well… Ataru was the kind of guy that wanted his women to be happy, and there was no way he could pull that off if he seduced every pretty face. Which meant that the smartest thing he could do was figure out where his limit lay, and stick to it to the best of his ability. Which meant that he had to treat every addition as though they might be the last.

“That Shampoo chick did sound kind of hot,” he mused aloud. “Exotic, sensual, obsessed with her man… Sort of like a human version of you, which makes me conflicted. On one hand, you’re awesome, and two of you would blow my mind. On the other, I already got the best of your type. Why go for second place?”

Lum giggled and clutched his arm really, really tightly, and all of a sudden Ataru was standing on his toes. Also, he swore he could smell ozone.

“You’re so sweet,” Lum purred. Her finger trailed his chest, leaving little tingling sparks where it went. “Maybe one of our friends instead? Benten is a real wildcat, and quite honestly Ran could use a chance to get laid… It might take the edge off a little.”

“I guess…” Ataru mused. “Tell you what, why don’t you call ’em over tonight for a little playtime? Maybe tell them about the film, get them interested in taking part? Or maybe sell it to them as if it’s something they might like to watch. You know, if you make them feel like everything will go wrong, they’ll probably want to at least watch for a laugh.”

“Oh, darling! I’m sure they’re not that bad at all!” Lum said, but then paused for a second or two before saying anything else. “… Well, maybe they are a little. I guess that might work. In the meantime, why don’t we at least take a look at this Shampoo? She might well be a really cute girl, and you’ll never know until you see her.”

“Then it’s settled!” Ataru declared, pointing his finger triumphantly down the street. “Off to the Cat Cafe!”

“Actually,” Lum said, adjusting his hand. “It’s this direction.”

1. Ataru quickly gets Shampoo interested in the film by making her Ranma’s character’s head bodyguard.
2. Shampoo is suspicious of Ataru immediately, and pretends to go along with things to discover the truth.
3. Before meeting Shampoo, Ataru encounters Mousse and instead resolves to get him his girl.
4. Ataru and Lum encounter a different cute girl at the cafe while Shampoo is out on delivery.
5. Something else