Story: Wild Ride For Ranma

All things considered, Akane was taking things pretty well. Upon learning that Miss Hinako was being possessed by some kind of sex demon who was, even at this very moment, corrupting a close friend of hers she had only run off at full pelt rather than screaming the hotel down. That was pretty good progress!

Rationally speaking this was the best course of action to take. Sure, she felt extremely guilty about leaving Ukyo behind like that but staying would obviously not do anything to help anyone. Of course, that sounded like a hollow justification, but what was she supposed to do? Turn around, run back and try to fight that thing by herself? And Ukyo on top of that? Nope!

Luckily for her, she could stop fighting between wallowing in guilt and trying to justify her actions when she ran smack into a hunk of meat. Or at least it felt like it. Akane bounced off him, stumbling backwards. She was ready to yell at them, until she saw who it was. Aha!

"Ryoga?" she asked. "What are you -" She stopped mid-question. Asking Ryoga Hibiki why he was at any given place was like asking someone missing a leg why they were carrying crutches. There were more important matters to deal with anyway. She grabbed hold of his hands before he could say a word. "Ryoga, I need your help!" she pleaded. "There's a corrupting perverted influence at work inside this very hotel!"

"It's alright Akane," Ryoga said, puffing out his chest. "I already know all about it! In fact, I'm looking for that wicked, evil influence at this very moment."

Eh? Ryoga... Already knew all about it? Well that's great! That should save a lot of time, shouldn't it? Ryoga was a tough fighter and - Also really weak to perversion. He didn't handle cute girls very well at all. He always tried to be so nice, not look at something he wasn't meant to. Something like a sex demon would spot that immediately and take full advantage of it! In short, they needed someone without any sense of shame!

"We need to find Ranma right away!" Akane declared. "Follow me, we need to find him quickly!"

"Right behind you, Akane! Lead on!"

Of course what Akane didn't quite realise was that classical misunderstanding. When Akane was talking about the succubus, he believed she was meaning Ranma. Therefore, when she suddenly declared that was who she was looking for without explaining... Well, you can see the problem without any further elaboration.

If not, hello and welcome to the world of Ranma 1/2. We have lots of pretty girls hanging around, but an even bigger supply of idiots and fools.

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Were Ranma the sort to know anything about Shakespeare, this is the point where she'd be saying something like 'my kingdom for some hot water'. As it was she was rushing around the hotel, or more accurately sneaking around trying to find somewhere, anywhere, that she could use to turn herself back into a boy. Grabbing some replacement clothes was remarkably easy: Turned a corner, there was a maid carrying several freshly washed dressing gowns. Easy to steal one from without getting noticed, especially given her level of stealth. Actually, she'd seen three of them already. But no hot water. Not for Ranma. No sir!

"Stupid curse," she groused. "Why did it have to be water that triggered it anyway? And why couldn't it be the other way around?"

It was really annoying when you think about it. Cold water is everywhere. Hot water requires a little extra efforts, like a fire or some electricity. A bath would've been ideal, but this was the kind of hotel that included them in the guest's own room rather than having a hot spring or specific bathing area for the guests to use. That rather limited her options by quite a large margin. Where the hell was she supposed to get hot water?!

Then it arrived! She saw a tea trolley going by and used her stealth to distract the woman pushing it then stole the kettle right out from under her nose. Aha! Ranma upended it - then yelped in surprise, this water was much hotter than she expected! But still, she could handle that pain - She was now a he again!

"Heh! Now let's see if Ryoga still wants to rumble," Ranma declared. He puffed out his chest, pounded his fist into his open palm then turned around and began to walk right back the way that he came - Only to walk right into a cleaner. Long story short there was a bucket over <i>her</i. Head and <i>he</i> was once again a <i>she</i>.

"Oh come on!" she yelled. "Not fair! That couldn't have even been thirty seconds!"

Tossing the bucket aside, now Ranma was in a really foul mood! These weird feelings she'd been having all night in this girl's body, they were really starting to get to her. What she really needed right now was a proper fight. Let off some steam. Let off some tension.

"Ranma! There you are!" yelled her absolute favourite person to fight with. Akane! Sure, the fights they had were more of the verbal sort, but that was more than enough right now! "We need your help!" Even better, she'd found someone to fight for her! Sometimes, if rarely, she could be such a considerate fiancee.

"That's right! We need your help...To die!" yelled Ranma's second most favourite person to fight with. Ryoga Hibiki! A really tough fighter who complimented his fighting style amazingly. Shame about that lame introduction he just used, but hey what can you do?

"Hi Ryoga, fancy meeting you here!" Ranma taunted, blowing him a kiss without thinking. Ryoga lunged forward with a punch that could pierce steel, but only if it hit. Ranma had no trouble flowing around it and launching her own counter attack. Unfortunately she slipped on a wet patch and wound up accidentally squeezing Ryoga's butt instead of the punch she'd been aiming at his... Uh... She couldn't remember actually.

"You relentless tease!" Ryoga yelled, spinning around and trying his best to kick her. To no avail: Ranma was too quick for the dork. As strong as he was Ryoga wasn't nearly fast enough to land a decisive blow that easily!

"Only just working that out now, are we?" Ranma retorted. She dropkicked Ryoga right in the face. He probably would've had the same reaction if a fly landed on him. See, this was what made fighting him so worthwhile. It came down to speed versus resilience. The mixup of fighting styles really helped Ranma develop a lot as a fighter. She blew him another kiss. "Still, if you didn't have such fun reactions I wouldn't be teasing you, now would I?"

"Honestly Will you two stop fighting for just one - Woah!"

That was Akane in the process of stepping into their fight and, incidentally, getting elbow nudged by Ryoga when he spun around causing her to fall forward face first right into Ranma's cleavage. Which put Ranma in two minds. On the one hand, served her right for stepping into a fight between two men. Or a man and a woman who was actually a man, but you get the idea! On the other hand Ranma was pretty sure she wouldn't let anyone else put their face where Akane's was right now as that was a rare treasure to be preserved!

"Guh!" Akane grunted. She grabbed hold of Ranma's boobs and pushed her face out. "Felt like I was being suffocated! Your stupid perverted curse made these far too big!"

"I'm so sorry Akane!" Great. Now she'd even ruined the fight. Kind of hard to justify fighting someone on their hands and knees begging for forgiveness. "I was too clumsy! You're not hurt are you?!"

"Oh, Ryoga... I'm fine," Akane cooed at him. That rose Ranma's dander a fair amount. How come she was always so kind to the pig? "To be honest, I am much more worried about the succubus than that glancing hit."

"Yeah, you would be more worried about - " Ranma began, dipping into her usual well of snark. Then her mind caught up with the rest of her thoughts. "Succubus? What succubus?"

"There's a succubus at work within this hotel!" Akane explained. Or, well... could you call that an explanation really? "It's already got hold of Ukyo! Ranma, Ryoga... We have to work quickly before she turns us all into perverts!"

Oh. That sounded pretty serious. That would explain Akane's mood, and... Also her state of dress. This was the kind of situation where a man has to be a man, even if he was a woman. Akane was Ranma's fiancee, after all. Even though it was an arranged marriage if something like this had spooked her then it was Ranma's responsibility to put things right!

"Don't worry Akane! I'll be sure to protect you!" Ryoga said. "I don't have a perverted bone in my body!"

Which was when Ranma sighed, tapped the dumb pig on the shoulder, then quite deliberately showed him a taste of paradise by flashing him her tits.

"You sure about that, pig boy?" Ranma asked, giving a meaningful glance down at the obvious tent getting pitched in the boy's trousers. "If something like this gets you hot and heavy, you don't stand a chance against some sex demon!"

Uh oh. Maybe that was a little bit too far? There was a really dark aura coming from around Ryoga right about now. "Like I said," the lost boy grimly declared. "Akane, I will protect you from the succubus... And it's obvious that Ranma has fallen under her influence already!"

He then turned around, picked Akane up over his shoulders and bolted off down the corridor.

"You idiot, what kind of stupid excuse is that?!"

Ranma leaped after Ryoga, creating a high speed chase through the corridor. Damn him! He was always trying to find excuses to go off alone with Akane! Wasn't it enough that he could turn into her pet pig at a moment's notice!

"It's alright Akane! I'll protect you from Ranma!" Ryoga yelled.

"And who will protect her from you?!" Ranma retorted.

"Ryoga! We don't have time for this!" Akane was yelling, thumping at his back as if he'd even notice. She struggled and tugged, trying to pull herself out of his grip. "It's alright, I think Ranma was just... Being... His usual dumb self!"

Then, to Ranma's surprise, she popped right on out, tumbled behind Ryoga and for the second time in as many minutes faceplanted right into Ranma's tits. Gah! One time was an accident, twice was a coincidence... If this happened a third time then that tomboy was going about it deliberately!

Once again Akane put her hands on Ranma's boobs for leverage, and upon her freedom sucked in air like she'd just been drowning. For his part Ryoga had stopped running and that dark aura was now positively demonic as he loomed over Ranma. Oh yeah! This was why she had run earlier!

"You fiend! Trying to corrupt her with those - Those - Those!"

"Quit playing the innocent act!" Ranma said, trying her best to sound confident but not really feeling it all that much. "If anyone's a pervert around here, it's probably you!"

"Will you two cut it out already?!" Akane yelled. "Honestly! Neither of you are under the succubus' influence! You're both being too much like your normal idiot selves!"

Well, if that didn't deflate the tension in the air. Both of them hung their heads down sheepishly. Yeah. Picking fights right now when Ukyo was in danger was a pretty dumb thing to do wasn't it?

"He started it," Ranma groused.

"Did not," Ryoga retorted.

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"Exhibit A, and Exhibit B!" Akane said, flicking them both right in the middle of the forehead. Even for a martial artist that still stings like crazy! "Alright. I can already see the problems this is going to cause. Ryoga is a walking hunk of meat with perfectly proportioned muscles and..." she stopped to wipe a bit of drool from her mouth. "And Ranma's cursed form is super cute, super curvy and super easy on the eyes." Again, that slight bit of drool, but Akane continued without letting Ranma the chance to think about what that meant. "Putting it bluntly you're both really attractive. That succubus is going to take one look at the pair of you and start playing head-games using your own sex appeal against you."

"Yeah, that makes sense..." Ranma trailed off. She scratched her head. Huh! Never had to fight a succubus before... "Got any bright ideas?"

Little did any of them realise, but a bright idea was about to be suggested. Unfortunately, said bright idea was much more likely to invite sexy-time than it was to defuse it.

1. Find some privacy. Masturbate until they have it out of their system.
2. Aversion therapy! Make the idea of finding each other sexy impossible.
3. Take off their clothes. Get used to each other's bodies so it won't distract them later.
4. Some other bright idea.