Monday 5 August 2024

Story: UY Secret Santa

 


This is normally the point where Ataru Moroboshi has a brilliant idea that fucks everything up. Usually ends up with him getting his butt whooped, or him lying on the ground twitching and scorched right after eating a hefty dose of electricity from Lum.


Not today. Because today, it was different. Today, he'd had sex. He'd lost his virginity. To Lum, admittedly, which was a little annoying, but... Only a little. Look at her, tucked into that wardrobe like that! He almost wanted to reach out and pet her head, such a cute expression on her face, and -


"Darling..." Lum muttered in her sleep, which made Ataru jump. Nope! Nope! That would summon another version of him if he wasn't careful. Damn, if only he had her doll, this would be so much easier! He could use that to directly control her dreams! Except that Bunnygirl version of Ryu-chan had it, and - 


And he had the ability to schedule a meeting with her at any time he wanted.


Now, this is the point where, quite specifically, a bad decision would have been made. Ataru would have obeyed his libido's desire to meet with Bunny Ryu again, which would have led to him encountering the supernaturally sexy Miss Sakura, whose very presence would have brainwashed him into compliance with whatever she wanted. However! This was an Ataru Moroboshi in the midst of post nut clarity. A rare thing indeed. What dolls did he have, here? Why, he had his own. He had Ryuunosuke's, too. It had been left behind by the Bunny version of her so that the two of them could stay bound to each other magically, right before she'd - 


Right before she'd run off. To find the other version of her and stop her from committing great mischief. And so, Ataru quickly scribbled in his notebook, to help make it a bit easier for her to catch up with her horny doppelganger. Time for a scheduled meeting, Ryu-chan! Kukuku!


=====


Out of all the women that Ryuunosuke had met, she'd wanted to take after Miss Sakura the most. A mature, confident woman, who exuded femininity while brooking no bullshit from those around her. She was tall, elegant, and beautiful from head to toe.


But after running into the Bunny version of herself, alongside Miss Sakura wearing one of her own, something kinda, sorta, broke in her brain a little bit. Which is why she was standing in this dressing room, wearing a sexy bunny outfit of her own, feeling kinda... good.


She wished Ataru was here to see this. For some reason. Couldn't say why for the life of her, but she did!


"Now, it's very important that when you walk, you put a little oomph into your hips," Sakura said. Her hands were resting on Ryuunusoke's waist, and - Ooh! Oh! Her hips were swaying from side to side, causing her butt to wiggle! It felt weird - but only at first. After a bit, it started feeling kinda... natural. Right. Like she should walk like this from now on. "Good girl. We'll have you busting the supernatural in no time flat!"


<i>Whisper to the doll...</i>


She turned and looked, seeing the Lum doll nestled in Sakura's cleavage. For some reason, and she didn't know why, Ryuunosuke said something really weird: "Dream of pills that make people smart. Yeah, pills that make people smart, really smart, genius level."


Which was a weird thing to say, but whatever. She returned her attention to the mirror, unable to believe that this was really her. She was so used to seeing herself in a boyish light, wearing manly clothes or acting all manly. Was this really her? Did she really have curves like that?


"Confidence has always been your issue," Sakura said. "That is, you have confidence in your ability to fight, and your ability to bring in customers to your shop, but you lack the confidence to express yourself properly. Focus on what you want. What you really want, and then take it with both hands!"


What she wanted? Well, what Ryuunosuke wanted, more than anything else was to give Ataru Moroboshi a lapdance. Sit in his lap, like she had been before. Maybe practise kissing with him or something. Huh. Would he like this...? Yeah, he would. He would definitely - 


"Pardon me one moment," Ryuunosuke said, turning around and picking the Lum doll right out of Sakura's cleavage. She pushed the woman away. She felt this really weird compulsion to... "You know what would be really cool? A portable hypnodisk that would be 100% effective on girls, whether human or alien. The more they watch it, the more okay they get with being in a harem."


"Ah... Are you quite alright?" Sakura asked.


"Hold on," Bunny Ryuunosuke said, peeking over Sakura's shoulder. "That doll is - Wait, gimme!"


Suddenly, both Sakura and Ryuunosuke (original) froze in place. Then, they turned and began to walk off in a certain direction. The same path.


"I really should get home," Ryuunosuke said.


"Yes, so should I," Sakura said.


"It's weird how we both live at the same place," Ryuunosuke said.


"Indeed," Sakura observed. "Though, for some reason I cannot remember when I moved into the Moroboshi place."


And they both walked side by side, wiggling their hips, while Bunny Ryu trailed after, a frown of deep concern on her pretty face. As well it should. None of this, not a single bit of it, felt anything like a good thing.


======


Waking up Lum from a nap was always a risky thing, but it had to be done. Ataru had to test it, you see, and this was the only means through which he could do so. While holding a copper wire, trailed to the floor, he poked Lum's face. Rubbed her horns. Physically hauled her out of the cupboard to ensure she didn't accidentally dream up anything else, and then...?


"I love you," he whispered in her ear.


"Love you too, Darling~" Lum rubbed at her eyes, lifting her head and - Instant hypno spiral. Right in her face. "Huh...?"


"Quite the brilliant strategy, don't you think?" Ataru asked. He watched with interest as her eyes started to spiral. A faint, distant smile fell upon her face. "This cabinet can make anything real. Anything at all. And so? Here we are! These pills opened my mind to possibilities I never would have dreamed of before!"


"Guh... Love you..." Lum burbled happily, her head starting to bob around.


"For example, the AI singularity," Ataru continued. "The idea that one day, an AI will develop the ability to program a brand new AI itself, one that is smarter than it. Which in turn shall develop one smarter, and so on, faster and faster and faster than the human race can keep up! These pills could only exist in reality thanks to the magic of this cabinet - but it might well induce a singularity in my own mind, as I become an even greater and greater genius!"


Lum nodded. It was almost the only thing she could do right now.


"And another thing it made me realise," Ataru said. "A deep self analysis. Why I crave a harem, when I already have you. In truth, I adore you, but I was afraid of planting down roots. The moment that I admitted that I loved you, cared for you, wanted to spend the rest of my life with you... my childhood would be over. My youthful adolescence, evaporated. Forever vanished. I'd have to face the future. My responsibilities would mount up. I was not intellectually or emotionally prepared for this, and so...?"


He reached out a hand, and brushed Lum's pretty face. She was muttering a single word over and over again now: "Harem".


"I am ready now," he said. "Lum, I will formally propose to you when I have an engagement ring to offer. In the meantime, do you have any complaints about us building a harem together?"


"No, Darling," Lum said. "A harem sounds amazing!"


Indeed it did. He put the disk aside, at least until the other girls arrived, and then...? He would make sweet love to his Oni Princess for a second time today, while lamenting what a fool he'd been. Oh... But he wasn't done quite yet. Of course, he'd seen that future where he had acquired a harem, and he knew full well that they'd need more than just him, the girls and a small living space. Much, much more than that!



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