Let’s take a moment to really look at Ranma and Akane and see what they’re like as romantic partners, shall we? To start with, they’re both exceptionally physically attractive. Ranma, in male form, has that scrappy, roguish handsomeness about him - lean, athletic, and confident in a way that’s hard to miss. It’s easy to see why girls get swept up in him, especially once he opens his mouth and starts boasting. His girl form, meanwhile, is undeniably cute: a pretty face paired with a tomboyish edge that feels natural rather than performative. It’s less "soft femininity" and more "someone who could still knock you flat if provoked."
Then there’s Akane. One might expect us to dwell on her tomboyish appeal, but honestly, that ground is already well covered elsewhere - Ranma’s curse accidentally claims a surprising amount of that territory. Akane’s appeal is simpler and more grounded. She’s cute. Straightforwardly pretty. Good proportions, fit, healthy, and clearly athletic. Canon backs this up: she has no shortage of male attention at school, and not all of it is played strictly for laughs. She’s the kind of girl boys fight over not because she’s unattainable, but because she feels real enough to imagine being close to - even if doing so often results in injury.
Ah, but looks only get you so far. What about personality?
Here things get more complicated.
Ranma is an egomaniac, yes - but canon makes it clear that it’s a learned survival trait rather than pure vanity. He was raised in constant competition, humiliation, and danger, and he compensates with bluster and bravado. Beneath that, though, he has a genuine moral compass. He hates seeing people in serious trouble and will intervene without hesitation when things turn truly ugly. What he doesn’t mind is embarrassment - especially when it isn’t his own. Ranma often uses teasing, mockery, and denial as shields, both to protect himself emotionally and to avoid confronting feelings he doesn’t know how to articulate. It’s easy to imagine him lingering nearby when someone’s upset, pretending indifference, quietly paying attention while refusing to engage directly.
And Akane? There’s a reason even early canon lampshades her temperament - Kasumi’s "nice girl" line exists for a reason. Akane is kind, considerate, and well-meaning, but she also has a short fuse and very little emotional filter. She wears her feelings openly, for better or worse. Unlike Ranma, she doesn’t hide confusion, jealousy, or hurt; she reacts to them immediately. Her violence is exaggerated for slapstick, but canon consistently frames it as impulsive rather than malicious. Akane genuinely tries to do the right thing, but she’s surrounded by chaos: unwanted suitors, absurd rivals, an enforced engagement, and a fiancé who refuses to be emotionally honest with her. Under those conditions, keeping one’s cool would be difficult for anyone - especially when she’s grappling with feelings she doesn’t want to admit, let alone understand.
But that's all how things <i>would</i> be if the Breast Inspector badge had not gotten involved. Now? Now Akane has some considerably larger breasts. Now? The two of them quite literally cannot take their hands off each other. It's as if someone had reached across the multiverse, leeched off all the excess unresolved attraction the two of them have for one another - and then poured them right into one particular iteration of them both.
The two of them could barely get two sentences out without either kissing, or hugging, or groping one another. They were also taking turns grinding their butts into the other's crotch. Er, Ranma was in girl form when doing that, in case you were wondering.
One would think that they would get bored of such behaviour. Settle down a bit, have a normal conversation, get to know each other in some manner other than the biblical sense, but - No. No, not at all. They were all over each other as if someone had ripped open a bag of steel ball bearings near an electromagnet. The two of them were spellbound, entranced, to the point that you couldn't only call it a consequence of the badge.
"Cute~" Ranma whispered in her ear, right before licking her earlobe. Akane, in turn, moaned while grabbing Ranma's butt, pushing their boobs together and indulging in lewd, perverted behaviour that would have left her floored to see herself do a mere month ago.
"Glad to see you're getting on with your new fiance," Yuka said, unperturbed owing to the special permission that the two of them had.
"So, Ranma?" Sayuri said. "Aside from this curse, and the fact you're really, really into Akane - what can you tell us about yourself?"
Ranma twisted around to sit in Akane's lap. It's quite astonishing how much height Ranma loses between forms, isn't it? She tilted her head back to allow Akane to plant kisses along her neck while she spoke to Akane's friends.
"Well, let's see," Ranma said. "I'm an awesome martial artist. I am a naturally gifted athlete in pretty much anything I try my hand at. Oh, and in case you didn't notice, I'm really, really attractive, charming and likable."
As if to make her case, Ranma flexed a bicep, and then Akane smooched it. Giving it a real wet one too.
"I see, I see!" Yuka nodded. "And what is it about Akane that you like?"
"Cuuuu~ute~" Ranma moaned as Akane's fingers found the sensitive part of her boobs. She was relentless. Merciless. She went for them the same way that she went for an opponent in a martial arts contest, without mercy or restraint.
"Yes, she is quite adorable," Sayuri said. "Akane, what drew you to Ranma?"
Akane simply giggled to herself, then popped open Ranma's top, letting her boobs spill out so she could get at them properly and answer the question at the same time. The two girls in front of her nodded in understanding, illustrating keenly how intrusively the badge had affected all of their thinking.
Ah, speaking of that badge, here comes Shampoo now. Hiroshi in tow, seeming a little too excitable for his own damned good. Not that anyone with reason or common sense about them could possibly even begin to blame him. Any man following that girl, wearing that pencil skirt and that half open blouse would naturally be excited. Especially when he had in mind what he had in mind!
"Hey there!" Hiroshi said, flashing a big ol' smirk at them. "Before you head off home, girls. I need you to do something for me. With the power of my badge, I hereby proclaim! Hot yuri threesome with you two and Shampoo! Your boobs henceforth, demand it!"
Ah, the ambiguity of language. Half of the problem was, Ranma and Akane were a little too caught up in each other to pay any heed to their surroundings. They were not in imminent danger, and the other half was there - so they would practically fall into each other, right here and now, rather than listen to what they were being told.
Furthermore, Hiroshi had not explicitly said their names in his little instruction there, as such -
"Okay that sounds awesome," Sayuri said, standing up and taking Shampoo's hand. "Come on, Yuka! I'll introduce you to the wild and wonderful world of yuri!"
"You do that every time you draw something new," Yuka sighed wearily, while taking Shampoo's other hand. "Come on, where do you want to do this? Let's get it over with already!"
"Wait, this not what Shampoo -"
"You know what, this is also fine!" Hiroshi said, giving it a thumbs up. "Furthermore, I hereby instruct that your breasts will give you addictive orgasmic delight whenever you have a threesome!"
The effect this had was immediate. If you watched Shampoo's face closely, you'd see it clearly. The two girls went for her exposed titflesh right away, and Shampoo's eyes rolled up into her head at the same instant. There are some pictures you can hear by just looking at them, well, this was a combination of sight and sound you could feel.
And boy, does that feel -
"Ohhhhhhhh~"
Yeah, you get the idea. Shampoo's little cunning plan hadn't quite gone the way she'd expected, and now her hot butt was getting hauled off into a hot threesome that was not, in fact, the one that her cunning plan had relied upon.
Normally, the universe found great amusement in making Ranma and Akane come at each other like a pair of pitbulls. But hey, take away one toy and the universe has others to play with.
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