Story: Love Normal

 

I was determined. Hell bent. The more I thought about it, the more sense it made. Keitaro was the cause. Somehow, it was him. Something about him was at the centre of everything. None of this had started until he'd showed up. I'd blamed myself, but really? Thinking about it, based on what Mistune had been saying then it all kicked off the day he got here! The incongruities, the inconsistencies, it all came back to Keitaro Urashima's day of arrival.

Though that did leave the question of 'why the day he arrived and not before then?' which I couldn't hope to answer. Hell, nobody really could. Except him. He might be able to answer, and I'd even figured out exactly how to make it happen! All I'd do is walk up to him, sit in his lap, then whisper in his ear a simple sentence: It's perfectly normal for you to tell me your secrets. Boom. Done. He'd spill his guts. Whatever was going on, I'd find out in no time flat and I'd even get to give him another steaming hot lapdance! It was the perfect plan! Win win, get the information and get to give that guy a lapdance!

For a half second I wondered if giving him a lapdance was not actually a normal thing, but merely became that because of Keitaro, but I dismissed it after a moment. Obviously it was normal, why wouldn't it be?

"Alright buster!" I yelled, storming into the living room. "You've got some questions to answer!"

My enthusiasm dampened considerably when I saw what was going on in here. Now, it was normal for Motoko to give Keitaro a lapdance. It was normal for Mitsune to give him one. Hell, it was normal for any girl walking the face of the planet to want to park her posterior in his lap and grind it for all it was worth.

What was considerably less normal was when two girls were on the same lap. Or more precisely, Motoko's naked butt was parked in Mitsune's lap, with the two of them wriggling away while Keitaro was sitting there like his spirit had escaped from his body.

"What the hell are you girls doing?" I squeaked. "Come on! Why do you think it's -" I stopped. Hadn't I said something to that effect earlier on? I think my face might have turned an odd shade of green upon realising that little detail.

Had I made that into a normal thing worldwide? I'd made it so that girls would sit on each other's laps like it was no big thing, giving each other lewd dances for the amusement of any boys who happened to be nearby! No, I couldn't let myself get distracted! Not now! This is important, this is essential, I had to get the truth from this boy right here and now!

"Alright, Keitaro!" I said, making sure to put a good hard snarl into it. "This is all your fault!"

"Oh, Naru, blaming Keitaro of everything under the sun like always," Mitsune shook her head.

"Indeed, that's such a normal thing for her to do," Motoko added.

"It's so normal it's tiring, leave him alone..." Shinobu muttered to herself. While taking notes of - No! Don't take notes! Don't corrupt your innocent eyes! I rushed over and covered them up, unable to bear the idea that poor Shinobu was getting weird thoughts! "Aww... I was enjoying that..." she puffed out her cheeks cutely. But didn't complain, because what I had done was, of course, normal to her.

"Listen to me, he's the one responsible for all this weirdness you noticed!" I yelled at Mitsune. In turn, my dear friend turned to me and shrugged. Like it was no big deal. Ooooh! So annoying! "It's n-"

"Actually, Keitaro has been super helpful right now," Mitsune said. "He's providing us with a fresh perspective."

"We think it's a curse at work," Motoko added, making sure to push her boobs right into Keitaro's head. Grr! I wanted to do that! After I'd made him confess of course. "Nothing you've said is weird given the evidence, but we're pretty sure it's not him."

"What would he be trying to do if it was him anyway?" Shinobu asked. And... I must have let my temper get the better of me. I didn't mean to yell what I did next. It wasn't part of the plan. My blood was running hot, my temperament has never been the best, but even so I should not have yelled - 

"He's trying to make it normal for us to be his harem!"

The word harem bounced around the room like an echo, coming back to me in a way that made it rhyme with 'idiot'. Oh no. Oh very no. What had I just done.

"I didn't mean it like that!" I yelled, but it was too late. There was a gleam in their eyes that hadn't been there before. Now my mind was racing, even as Motoko - That's Motoko of all people! - Grabbed Keitaro's head and stuck her tongue down his throat like she was fishing for his tonsils. The lewd dancing they'd been doing until now had the kind of usual air of 'just doing it for fun', but now? Now they were getting <i>really</i> lewd with him.

While Motoko was tongue wrestling him, Mitsune was licking his face and mewling seductively. "Hey, Kei-chan, can I take your bed toni~ight?" she asked. "I know it's Naru's turn, but - "

"My turn nothing!" I yelled, stomping across the room. Would a well phrased sentence counter the effect? Could I undo it if I said just the right things? I had to think this through carefully and stop talking - after I hauled those two off of him right this instance!

"Ohhh, I still can't believe it!" Shinobu swooned. "Me, in a harem! It's a good thing I signed up for those bridal training classes."

The <i>what</i> training classes?! That bit of weirdness caught me so off guard that I wound up planting my foot weirdly, tripped, stumbled, and completely failed to notice one of the earrings come off my ear, where it rolled along the floor right towards Shinobu's feet.

An important detail, as I'm sure you can imagine...

=====

Ah, it was so difficult dealing with a first crush, especially with someone so unconventional. Yet here we are. I, Shinobu Maehara, have a crush on Keitaro Urashima.

Oh, it was surely such a small and simple thing compared to the feelings that Naru, Motoko and Mitsune obviously felt for him. Nonetheless, it was a feeling that was probably destined to grow and swell as time passed! And the fact that it was normal for me to be in his harem was like a true blessing!

Even so, I would have to wait before doing anything physical with him. Just because I was a harem member didn't mean <i>that</i> was normal as well... Although it would certainly give me the time I needed to prepare for -

Hrm? Something rolled into my foot. It was an earring. Just one earring. An earring which seemed fairly bland, not that interesting, pretty unremarkable... but I still felt a minor compulsion to pick it up. To put it on my ear.

Of course, you all know full well the effect this earring has... but none of us knew quite yet. It wouldn't be long before we worked it out. In the meantime though... which earring do you think it was? The one that makes everything the wearer does normal? Or the one that grants the power to make things normal by proclaiming it so?