Story: Double Trouble

 

Ah, Ukyo Kuonji. It's hard not to pity her. She's not a bad girl, by any stretch of the imagination. She's not antagonistic in the same way that certain others are. She actually gets on pretty well with most of the cast, save for when they're being stupid - 

Hold up, wait a second, let's rephrase that. Um... She actually gets on pretty well with most of the cast, save for when they're being especially stupid, above and beyond their normal. Yes, that is much better!

Anyway, her role in the harem is that of the childhood friend. Such a typical loser role. The girl that is cute, nice, pretty, but also stands no chance at all before the indomitable might of the tsundere opposition. Rare is the time where the childhood friend comes out ahead, and Ukyo is certainly not one of those times. Some ship her with Ryoga, but it's clear that her very own creator intended a different course for her - That of being hooked up with Konatsu.

It's not a bad ship. Konatsu is adorable. Konatsu would make an excellent wife... husband? Once you get around certain psychological trip ups from that traumatic upbringing. Not knowing the value of things, being easily tricked by food or comfort. Once you get past those? Fiercely protective. Nobody is hurting you ever again without having to watch the shadows.

What's more, as previously established, Konatsu is cute as a button. Put him in a maid's uniform and he'll slay it like few others. Yes, male pronouns were used there. Konatsu is biologically male, and... Honestly, it's hard to say if he simply identifies as a woman or his upbringing had been that strange. Either Konatsu is a straight guy that convincingly acts like a girl, or they're a trans lesbian who has no intention of physically transitioning.

Either way, Ukyo was currently looking directly at a future where she was heavily, heavily pregnant and married to someone she hadn't met yet, who seemed nice enough but also wasn't quite what she'd imagined herself winding up with.

This was, naturally, somewhat disconcerting. Not because she objected to the idea of marriage. Ukyo had never been particularly opposed to marriage. Nor did she object to children. She liked children well enough. It was the fact that this particular future seemed to have skipped several rather important steps. There was no awkward courtship. No dramatic confession. No agonising realisation that she'd fallen in love with someone she'd known for years.

Apparently she'd just met Konatsu at some point, thought well, he's nice, and then the universe had apparently hit the fast-forward button. And now she was pregnant. Very pregnant.

"So, about Ranma?" Ukyo began.

"Is this about..." her future self asked, gently patting at her stomach. "Or, you know?"

"Oh yeah, I'd love to hear all about my unborn child," Ukyo quipped. "Their tastes, their interests, what sorta cravings they cause - Of course it's Saotome I wanna know about!"

Her future self sighed wearily. "We found him," she said. "But gosh darn, he's just far too adorable and helpless, we couldn't stay mad at him."

"No, really, she can't," Konatsu said. "Ranma is quite charming, it's easy to see why he's so popular with the ladies."

This was rather hard for Ukyo to accept. So, to be clear on this: It sounded like Ranma managed to charm his way out of her bad books, but then they didn't wind up together anyway for some reason? The scowl on her face grew heavier than before.

"I know what you're thinking," future her interrupted. "But really, things aren't so bad. He's helped us set up a proper business."

"We're opening a second location next month," Konatsu said. "Or, we were before we wound up in the past."

A second... location...? Ukyo blinked rapidly and tried to digest that information. Of course, her business as an okonomiyaki chef was always top priority, but... Oh boy, this was a lot to take in. It's really, really different from the direction she'd intended for herself. 

But all the same... Ukyo is a pragmatic woman. Konatsu wasn't exactly hard on the eyes or anything, and... This was definitely, absolutely her own future self that she was talking with. A successful franchise?

"So where is he then?" Ukyo asked.

"Place called Furinkan," future her said. "Part of Nerima ward. Kinda near Tomobiki and Juuban."

"Somehow, Furinkan is the most normal of those three districts," Konatsu sighed. "In one, I was nearly shocked by a flying oni. In the other, a demonic phone box in human form tried to drain my life force, until I was saved by some girls in -"

"Furinkan, you say?" Ukyo grumbled to herself. "Alright. I'm heading there personally, then. Thanks for the heads up."

She made to leave, but then.. Found herself trailing to a complete stop. What would she do when she met up with Ranma? Would she bash him over the head, make up with him and call it good? Genma at least had a thrashing coming. Would she melt right away, the moment that she met him? Memories of a time long gone, flooding back to her, making her remember why they were such close friends in the first place?

"And where did you meet Konatsu?" Ukyo asked.

"Huh? Oh... Konatsu was staying at this crummy cafe run by his wicked step-family," Ukyo's future self said. "Never went there myself, but it was in the forest near Furinkan, right?"

"Yes, that's right!" Konatsu said. "The Red Hot Tea House Kunoichi. Good gracious, I've not been there in quite some time now. Should I tell them that you are with child?"

"Urgh, no thanks!" Ukyo grunted. "They tried kidnapping me and Akane, stuck us in those bunnysuits and... Urgh, the sight of those ugly mugs..."

Hrm. Okay then. There might be something to that... Maybe she ought to drop by there herself? Yeah, check it out a bit, see if she could find out more about Konatsu, and then - 

"Wahhhhh!"

... Huh? What the... Huh? Ukyo looked back, and saw herself still heavily pregnant, but also... Konatsu was cradling something in his arms. Ukyo tilted her head in confusion at what she was seeing here. A crying child, perhaps one and a half years old...? The hell?

"Hush now, Ranma!" Konatsu said, soothing the little one with remarkable ease that made Ukyo feel... funny. "It's alright, you've just been spooked by spontaneous timeline changes causing you to exist sooner than you should have."

Uyko's mouth opened and shut quickly. She raised a finger in the air to question it, but -

"Did you decide to check in on Konatsu early?" the future version of her asked, sounding a little annoyed. Ukyo could only nod her head. "Well, now you're going to have to stick to that! I guess if that's Ranma, this will have to be Akane. Unless it's another boy... We'll work something out."

"We always do," Konatsu said. "Um... And now we were opening three locations instead of just one."

"I'm just... gonna go..." Ukyo whispered to herself. Goodness, her legs felt like jelly all of a sudden. Urgh... Let's see, Nerima right? That was Tokyo, which would be this direction? "Before I make another decision that I'll probably regret..."

To quote Perfect Cell: Multiverse theory is a bitch. To expand upon the idea, so is reflexivity where time travel is involved.